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Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Where Are They Now, 2011: Bookkeeping The Retired Guys

A lot of "where are they now" posts on other websites tend to deal mainly in answering a different question altogether; namely, "what did these players used to do?" Since it is assumed that that is known by anyone seeking to ask the original question - else it wouldn't have been asked - such matters are not dealt with on this website. Instead, we deal with the question that was actually asked; where are these players now?


Tariq Abdul-Wahad - Abdul Wahad part-owns France's first black TV channel, Telesud.


Shareef Abdur-Rahim - Reef was an assistant coach with the Kings for two seasons, before being moved up to assistant general manager this season. By proxy, if not by choice, he has a role in the Kings's uncertain future.


Cory Alexander - Last time we checked in on Alexander, he was working as an announcer for Virginia games. He still is, but not entirely by design. That link is to a very lengthy breakdown of Alexander's post-retirement life; long story short, he's lost all his money, and he's suing Bank of America for it back.


Courtney Alexander - Alexander and his wife run a not for profit youth development program. This article alludes to a possible comeback attempt.


Derek Anderson and Ron Mercer - Last time we checked in on Ron Mercer and Derek Anderson, the pair were returning to Kentucky to complete their degrees. Anderson has also commissioned a documentary about the 1996 National Championship winning Wilcatds, dubbed The Untouchables.


Kenny Anderson - Since the last update, Kenny Anderson has graduated with a degree in organisational leadership, and works as a personal trainer.


Shandon Anderson - Shanderson owns a salon, a spa and a vegetarian restaurant, runs fashion shows, and wears skirts.


Brandon Armstrong - Cannot be traced.


Darrell Armstrong - Armstrong is an assistant coach for the Mavericks.


Stacey Augmon - Augmon is an assistant coach for the Nuggets.


Vin Baker - Previous looks at Vin Baker mentioned how he was a student assistant at Texas Southern university, back in basketball after losing his home and his restaurant business to foreclosure. He has since left Texas Southern and returned to his high school, Old Saybrook in Connecticut, where he is the boy's basketball coach. This month's SLAM Magazine features a really long feature about Vin, reproduced here.


Brent Barry and Jon Barry - The duo followed in their dad's footsteps and became media personalities after their retirement. Brent is quite good at it, Jon isn't. Jon gets more work.


Joseph Blair - With his lengthy and prestigious European career slowing down, Blair retired two years ago. He is now the executive director of the Arizona Basketball Alumni Foundation (a foundation Blair himself created to facilitate alumni with community outreach efforts), owns Blairplayers LLC (which runs sports camps), owns a team called the Santa Ana Blairplayers (a team in Costa Rica, formerly known as Coyotes de Santa Ana), and now has a day in Tucson named after him. That's when you know you've made it.


Corie Blount - Blount was released from prison last May. He now co-owns an AAU team.


Calvin Booth - The last player from Penn State to have been drafted, Booth spoke of becoming a scout upon retirement, but it is unclear whether he ever did this.


Bruce Bowen - Bruce Bowen works as an analyst for ESPN, a role he performs in a series of bowties. Here is one such bowtie.


There are many, many, many, many more where that came from.


Ryan Bowen - Upon retiring, Bowen returned to his alma mater (Iowa), and worked last year as a video coordinator and administrative assistant.


Michael Bradley - Michael Bradley became a sports agent, starting his own agency, Bradley Sports Management. Clients included Andre McGee (Louisville), Jonathan Kale (Providence), Mark Sanchez (Boise State), Jeff Xavier (Manhattan/Providence) and Jackson Capel (Evangel, NAIA). However, all those players now seem to have found alternative representation, and the website for Bradley Sports Management no longer exists. (Or rather, it does, but only as a piece of useless spam.) No longer in that business, Bradley is nonetheless still in basketball, serving as head coach for Summit Country Day School in Cincinnati.


Shawn Bradley - Last year, Bradley ran as a Republican candidate for the 44th district seat in Utah's House of Representatives. He lost. After that, he volunteered at a leper colony. Spoiler alert: this is the only such entry on this list.

Bradley also recently joined in on a Jimmer Fridette tribute song, sung to the tune of Wanted Dead Or Alive by Bon Jovi. He's the tall one in a wig.




P.J. Brown - Brown lives in Slidell, Louisiana, where he and his wife run a not-for-profit youth foundation.


Rick Brunson - After a couple of years as an assistant at Hartford, Brunson was recruited by Tom Thibodeau, and is back with Chicago as an assistant.


Greg Buckner - Marc Spears reported on a comeback attempt. Hasn't happened yet though.


Pat Burke - Pat Burke will improve you for $85 an hour. Incidentally, here's that Pat Burke hair restorer commercial again.




Elden Campbell - Campbell is having an incredibly low-key retirement. Got nothing. Not even a home town.


Jason Capel - At the time of the last Jason Capel update, Jason Capel was an assistant coach at Appalachian State. He is now the head coach, and went 16-15 in his first year.


Maurice Carter - Cannot be traced.


Sam Cassell - Cassell is an assistant coach with the Washington Wizards.


Kelvin Cato - New Kelvin Cato information is scarce. According to his Twitter bio, he "just chills." So here's some old Kelvin Cato information. In 1999, Kelvin Cato created a children's book.


Calbert Cheaney - Cheaney is an assistant coach with the Warriors.


Eric Chenowith - Chenowith is an assistant coach at his former high school, Villa Park. He is also a partner in a design and construction company called "All American." See what he did there.


Doug Christie - Christie runs Christie Sports Management, which is a training company, not an agency.


Keon Clark - Keon Clark is currently in prison, again, sentenced to 33 months for repeatedly driving on a revoked license. The amount of driving convictions Keon has accumulated in his life is freaking ridiculous, so freaking ridiculous that I can't even list them.


Speedy Claxton - This summer, Claxton officially announced a retirement that had been unofficial for about three years. The Warriors then hired him as a scout. You can also add Speedy Claxton to the List Of NBA Players With Bands Named After Them, a list also featuring Mookie Blalock and Michael Finley.


Mateen Cleaves - Cleaves works two jobs - he does analysis for Detroit Pistons games, and owns a record label to which Jon Connor is signed. This is Jon Connor.




Keith Closs - Keith Closs does not appear to be playing anywhere, but he tweets about going to AA meetings. Good for him.


Chris Crawford - Chris Crawford and his wife Stacy (highschool sweetheart and former Indiana State volleyball player) had a daughter in September. Congratulations!

Chris Crawford trivia: in addition to his lengthy if injury ridden NBA career, Chris Crawford spent two seasons in the Houston Astros organisation as a pitcher. His walk numbers were quite high, but otherwise, he put up OK numbers. Giving up only 1 home run in 93 innings will keep you in most games.


Austin Croshere - Croshere is a pregame/postgame analyst for Pacers games on FSN Midwest.


Michael Curry - Curry is associate head coach (i.e. lead assistant) for the Sixers.


Antonio Davis - Davis lives in Atlanta, where he is still a regional representative for the NBPA. Bizarrely, he is also an ice hockey coach, on a team featuring his wife as general manager and his daughter as a player.


Dale Davis - Dale Davis carefully selects business ventures that create optimistic revenue streams and make worthwhile contribution to society by creating employment with positive social reinforcement.


Justin Davis and Ray Young - For training camp in 2005, the Golden State Warriors signed Justin Davis and Ray Young, both of whom had gone to high school with Baron Davis. (Young, a former McDonald's All-American, was also briefly a team mate of his at UCLA.) Young has not played since, and Davis managed only one more year before knee injuries ended his career. Still nothing can be found about Young's whereabouts, but Davis has reappeared on the scene, now employed as the project co-ordinator at the Mitchell Kapor Foundation in the Bay Area. As for what that entails, we'll leave that up to the press release. Or to Justin Davis himself:



Keep your eyes peeled for the Drew Gooden cameo.


Andrew DeClercq - At the date of the last check-in, DQ was an assistant coach at Montverde Academy in Florida. Not now - DeClercq is now the head coach at Foundation Academy, an Orlando Christian school, as well as the owner of his own academy, DeClercq Basketball. He also has a real estate portfolio.


Tony Delk and Scott Padgett - Delk and Padgett both returned to their alma mater, Kentucky, to become "coaches in training." Having seemingly finished their training, both have moved on. Delk stayed with the team but changed roles, becoming the assistant director of basketball operations. Meanwhile, Padgett left to take an assistant coach's gig at Manhattan. When Manhattan changed head coaches this month, hiring Steve Masiello, Padgett made the cut and will return for a second season.


Michael Dickerson - Michael Dickerson has not retired again, and is currently living in Toronto. He has been working out, continues to look for a comeback opportunity, and is wanted by IBL team the Edmonton Energy.


Derrick Dial - Cannot be traced.


Vlade Divac - Divac is now president of the Serbian Olympic Committee. Wikipedia carries stories of unsuccessful investments Divac has attempted over the years; mindful of Wikipedia's habit of deleting swaths of its own information, we shall carry that blurb for you here.

Divac has been involved in many non-basketball endeavors while still actively playing in the NBA, and more so after he retired. He is an active restaurant investor in the Sacramento, California area. However, his attempts to make major investments in Serbia failed, for a variety of reasons.

The most notable affair was a highly publicized business venture—takeover bid of profitable beverage producer Knjaz Miloš. Divac's company "Apurna" in a joint venture with French dairy giant Danone ostensibly proposed the best bid, but the takeover was aborted by the Serbia's Securities Commission, because Danone/Apurna allegedly offered extra money to small shareholders. In the repeated bid, Divac and Danone eventually withdrew and the sale went to FPP Balkan Ltd., a privatization fund from Cayman Islands. The entire messy affair caused great friction within the Serbian government, wide speculation about corruption, resignation of the Securities Commission chief, and even police investigation.

Another similar, though less spectacular, episode happened with 2005 Divac's attempt to take over the Večernje novosti, a Serbian high-circulation daily. He made an agreement with small shareholders to take over the company by means of registering a new company with joint capital, which would increase the share capital. However, the Serbian Government intervened and halted what should have been a mere technical move. While the attempted takeover was a "backdoor" one indeed, it was legal and similar cases had already happened. The government ostensibly feared lack of control over the influential daily. Even through the Supreme Court of Serbia eventually ruled in Divac's favor, he withdrew from the contest, citing "friendly advice" by unnamed persons. Embittered, he decided to stop his attempts to invest in Serbia: "All of this is ugly and I'm very upset... I realized that there's no place for me in Serbia and my friends can meet me in Madrid from now on... In Serbia, some different rules are in effect, and I can't conceive them".

However, that turned out not to be true, as in October 2007 Divac got legally registered as 100% owner of Voda Voda, a bottled water brand previously owned by businessman Vojin Đorđević. That transaction was also followed by a stir of controversy, as Đorđević publicly accused Divac of deceit, asserting that he broke a gentlemen's agreement they had, and questioning the validity of the contract that Divac presented to the Serbian Business Registers Agency. The circumstances surrounding the deal (as of November 2007) are still unclear: Divac claims that he indeed loaned some money to the Đorđević's Si&Si company, which was in financial troubles, and after Đorđević failed to fulfill his part of the deal, just used the contract, already properly signed by Đorđević, to claim ownership of the company.



Michael Doleac - Upon retirement, Doleac returned to the University of Utah to go to medical school, concurrently working as a graduate assistant for the basketball program. He later changed from reading medicine to physics, and intends to become a teacher.


Predrag Drobnjak - After beginning the season unsigned, Drobnjak signed in February with Greek team Iraklis, playing in one A1 league game. However, he retired later that month. Iraklis have also had five head coaches thus far this season. Basketball employment in Greece is not steady work.


Howard Eisley - Eisley is now a player development assistant coach for the L.A. Clippers.


Obinna Ekezie - Ekezie is the founder and CEO of Wakanow.com, a Nigerian travel agency.


Evan Eschmeyer - After knee injuries forced him to quit, Eschmeyer returned to Northwestern to complete a law/business double degree, founded an online recruiting agency (now defunct), and now sells renewable energy products for a living.


Danny Fortson - Despite his high profile as a player, Fortson has completely disappeared off the map in the four years since his retirement, and cannot be traced.


Tremaine Fowlkes - I don't understand what all this is, but it appears Tremaine Fowlkes's real estate company won a big judgement, but then lost it on appeal.


Adonal Foyle - After managing only 10 games in the last two seasons, Foyle retired this summer. The Magic immediatey hired him as director of player development.


Lawrence Funderburke - Funderburke completed an MBA at the University of Phoenix, and runs a youth organisation, one with a really slick website. It is not a basketball venture, although it does dabble in that; rather, it relates to life in general, dispensing matters such as financial advice and career instruction. It also used to offer diet tips, although the new-look website seems to have gotten rid of that feature.


Pat Garrity - After retiring in 2008, Garrity went to Duke to join their business school, graduating this year. Once he does, he will begin working at Bridgewater Associates, a hedge-fund manager for whom he has worked part-time concurrent to his studies.


Kendall Gill - Gill works as an analyst for Bulls games on CSN Chicago, as well as for the Big Ten Network. He also still boxes, and last April won the first bout of his career. It came 5 years after his previous fight, at the rip old age of 41.


Dion Glover - Micaiah Diondae Glover now flits about the Georgia area, coaching at camps and hosting skills clinics.


Anthony Goldwire and Adrian Griffin - After a couple of quiet years, Goldwire made a splash when he was hired as an assistant coach by the Milwaukee Bucks. He took the position vacated by Adrian Griffin, who returned to Chicago to do the same job there.


Brian Grant - Slam Online carried a long feature on Grant's new life as recently as January. If you did not know already, Grant has been diagnosed with early onset Parkinson's disease.


Rob Griffin - Griffin is currently serving three years of probation, agreed upon in a plea deal for failure to pay child support. He is now the sales and marketing president at Get Lucky Productions, whatever that is.


Tom Gugliotta - Go to any golf course in the land, hang around for a while, and you'll meet Googs eventually. In retirement, the man is playing a lot of golf. Googs was also recently a compelling protagonist in a Twitter meme, created by Evan Dunlap, involving NBA players names as websites (i.e. Tom Googliotta). Other entries = Ndudi eBay, bit.ly Nailon, Michael Flickrson, imageshaq.us, O.J. Mayoclinic.com, PerezWalton, Lior Eliyahoo, timofeymoz.gov, Michael Reddit, and, pleasantly, ShammondSports.com. Everyone was a winner here.


Darvin Ham - Ham is the head coach at the D-League's New Mexico Thunderbirds. His assistant coach is Sean Rooks.


Ben Handlogten - Up until December, Handlogten ran BBA Properties, a Charlotte-based construction firm. He now works for ACO Medical Supply as an operations co-ordinator.


Penny Hardaway - This summer, Penny expressed an interest in joining the Miami Heat. Miami did not seem to requite it. Currently not playing, and turning 40 in July, Hardaway is an executive producer and co-host of the the Bottom Line Sports Show.


Matt Harpring - Harpring does TV work for both the Jazz and NBA TV.


Othella Harrington - Since an unsuccessful tryout in Iran back in 2009, Othella cannot be traced.


Lucious Harris - The only progress report on Lucious Harris comes from his Linkedin page, which reveals a non-descript role at a company to which no explanation or background is given. Indeed, if there's two Lucious Harris's in Los Angeles, it might not even be the same guy.


Juaquin Hawkins - Hawkins runs his own foundation, http://www.hawkhoopssportsfoundation.org/. After surviving a debilitating stroke in 2008, he is also now an ambassador for the American Stroke Organisation, and the story of his basketball career is being written in an as yet unreleased book, tentatively entitled "Soaring With the Hawk." It was due to have published late last year, but if it did, it did so quietly.


Alan Henderson - At last count, Henderson returned to Indiana and attended business school.


Steven Hill - Hill was a Portland Trail Blazer as recently as six months ago. However, after a brief return to the Tulsa 66ers and yet another injury, Hill retired from the game in November, aged only 24. In the short time hence, he has not been heard from.


Tyrone Hill - Hill is an assistant coach for the Atlanta Hawks.


Fred Hoiberg - Hoiberg left the Timberwolves to take the head coaching position at Iowa State, despite having had no previous coaching experience. He went 16-16 in his first season with a 3-13 conference record, and has seemingly determined that the place should become a haven for transfers, having already scored all four of Chris Babb, Chris Allen, Korie Lucious and Royce White as commitments. Whether or not that's an excessive amount, time will tell, and it's certainly risky to land that much history on one team. But it's certainly a strategy.


Jeff Horner - Foot injuries ended Horner's short pro career, and he is now head boy's coach at West Des Moines Valley high school.


Robert Horry - Horry works as an occasional ambassador for the NBA, and does occasional TV spots with ESPN. He also owns a sports bar in Houston.


Allan Houston - Technically, Allan Houston is the assistant general manager with the New York Knicks. However, given the lack of clarity that now exists with the Knicks's front office situation - whereby GM Donnie Walsh seems to have less authority in the decision making process than the head coach of a struggling Sun Belt Conference team - it is unclear from the outside quite what Houston's role entails.


Lindsey Hunter - Hunter is a a player development assistant for the Chicago Bulls, a role he held in an unofficial capacity towards the tail end of his playing days.


Bobby Jackson - Jackson works as an ambassador and scouting assistant for the Kings. He's in a tough spot - as much as he may hope the Kings stay in Sacramento, he is employed by people who hope they don't.


Jim Jackson - Jackson is an announcer for the Big Ten Network, owns several restaurants, and has a large real estate portfolio.


Marc Jackson - Jackson retired two years ago, citing a desire to become a cowboy, according to Spanish media at the time. Google Translate was less clear as to whether he truly meant that or not; the fact that Jackson now works on the Sixers' pre- and post-game shows as an analyst suggests that maybe he didn't.


Chris Jefferies - Jefferies last played in 2005, only three short years after being an NBA first round pick. He is now the vice president of a Vegas-based concierge service. As for a comeback attempt? It doesn't sound likely.


Horace Jenkins - Jenkins - who spent three years as a postman before going to college, becoming one of the nine players in Division 3 history to play in the NBA, a former NCAA Slam Dunk champion, and one time Piston - last played in 2008 and cannot be traced since that time.


Britton Johnsen - Johnsen retired from the game this summer, and now works (or will work) as a trainer at this camp. To commemorate Johnsen's retirement, here is Britton Johnsen dunking on LeBron James.

Unlike the Jordan Crawford moment, this one couldn't be confiscated. Ervin Johnson - Johnson works as an ambassador for the Denver Nuggets. Alvin Jones - Georgia Tech's Jones last played late in 2008 and cannot be traced since. Eddie Jones - Jones was inducted in the Temple Hall of Fame a couple of months ago, but this is the only trace of him that can be found. In lieu of Eddie Jones news, here's an Eddie Jones highlight mix. If you want to see someone take a layup from the three point line, skip to the 2:50 mark. Mark Jones - Jones is now a personal basketball trainer with a website. Kerry Kittles - With his career ended early by injuries, Kittles returned to Villanova, earned an MBA, and is now an "associate" at Ledgemont Capital. Brevin Knight - Knight is an analyst on FSN South, covering Grizzlies games. Toni Kukoc - In retirement, Kukoc lives in Illinois, runs a foundation, and plays a lot of golf. Indeed, Kukoc plays so much golf that he wants to play it to an Olympic standard. Ibrahim Kutluay - Kutluay retired in 2009 and now runs a basketball academy. He in fact started the academy back in 2011, but of course, he has far greater time to devote to it now. Christian Laettner - A few years ago, Laettner was rich enough to almost buy the Memphis Grizzlies. This is no longer the case, however; his real estate business, ran with former team mate Brian Davis, has fallen on hard times, recently defaulting on a $3 million loan to Shawne Merriman. Laettner is now trying to make it as a coach. To that end, Laettner has started his own basketball academy, the website to which carries this message:
I offer discounts to all players, teams and coaches who hail from the states of Kentucky, North Carolina and Connecticut. This comes from the compassion and generosity of my heart and soul for causing you all so much pain, agony and hate over my four year career at Duke!!
Obvious troll is obvious. Raef LaFrentz - Despite the calibre and fame of his career, LaFrentz is having a very low key retirement and cannot be traced. Voshon Lenard - Cannot be traced. Quincy Lewis - Lewis retired after the 2009 season. He returned to the University of Minnesota to complete a sports management masters, works as an assistant coach at a local high school, and interns with the university's Golden Gopher Fund thing. Randy Livingston - Livingston just completed his first season as head coach of the D-League's Idaho Stampede, where, amongst others, he coached Antoine Walker. The team started 0-8 and 2-13, but improved throughout and finished 24-26. Tyronn Lue - Lue is an assistant coach with the Celtics. There were rumours of a comeback, but he stayed where he was. George Lynch - Lynch joined Southern Methodist University in 2006 as a graduate assistant, but cannot be traced since that time. Arvydas Macijauskas - Macijauskas made his unofficial retirement official this June, and was later announced to be joining Lithuanian team Perlas as an assistant coach. However, he quickly left, citing personal reasons, personal reasons that probably had something to do with his marriage the following month. He is now an expectant father and occasional basketball teacher. Tito Maddox - Cannot be traced since the last update. The one with the brain tumour. Don't think there was ever a Friends episode called that. Mark Madsen - This time last year, Mark Madsen was an assistant coach for the Utah Flash of the D-League. However, Madsen has left basketball for the time being to return to Stanford to attend business school. Donyell Marshall - Donyell did only one year of TV work for the Sixers before moving into college coaching, becoming an assistant at George Washington. It is he who Marc Jackson replaced on the broadcasts. Darrick Martin - Murray is the assistant director of player development for the Timberwolves. Jamal Mashburn - Jamal Mashburn is probably worth more than everyone above combined. In his own words:
I've always been in business and own franchises of Papa John's, Dunkin' Donuts and Outback Steakhouse, as well as car dealerships. I own over 34 Outbacks, 37 Papa John's and dealerships in Kentucky. I've always wanted to carry a briefcase.
At least 71 restaurants, and he also still does TV work for ESPN. Buy that man a briefcase. Desmond Mason - Desmond Mason now works in a bank. Tony Massenburg - All hopes of one final comeback look to be off. Massenburg, now 43, hasn't threatened the possibility for two years. He opened a restaurant in Kentucky, but it closed after three ugly, ugly months. Jeff McInnis - McInnis, who has been quite low key in retirement, has launched a skills academy. Aaron McKie - McKie is an assistant coach with the Sixers. Gerry McNamara - McNamara's professional career was very short, as he found the professional game to be much less fun than the collegiate one. In retirement, he returned to Syracuse to complete a masters, concurrently working as a graduate assistant. He is still there. Stanislav Medvedenko - Last time we checked in on Slava, he was performing cameos in Carmen Electra films. This update is slightly less interesting, but far more worthwhile - Slava has set up a youth basketball foundation in his homeland. Chris Mihm - Chris Mihm news is scarce, other than the news that he sold his house for $90,000 less than he bought it. Him and a million others, no doubt. Reggie Miller - Reggie is an announcer for TNT, and also worked some of the NCAA tournament with CBS. Cuttino Mobley - In the offseason, many teams were mentioned as possible candidates for a Mobley comeback, including Prokom Gdynia in Poland. In the end, none of the came fruition, and Mobley opted for a rather dramatic career change, funding (or attempting to fund) a medicinal marijuana centre. Brian Morrison - Cannot be traced. Alonzo Mourning - Mourning remains with the Miami Heat, serving as the Vice President of Player Programs and Development. He also recently made the news for a random act of kindness.. And he could also probably still start for the Heat. Gabe Muoneke - Muoneke retired last year, citing his disillusionment with the professional game. He is now an oil engineer in West Africa. It's a unique choice, and might seem like a strange one, until you consider that that's exactly what he majored in at Texas. Basketball was always the backup. Dikembe Mutombo - Deke has been busy stacking awards. He received an honorary degree from Haverford liberal arts college, and won the Goodermote Humanitarian Award. In retirement, he devotes his time to humanitarian causes, specifically in his native Congo. Mamadou N'Diaye - Mamadou N'Diaye retired this summer, returned to Auburn to complete his degree, and plans to go into coaching. Matt Nelson - Last heard of returning to university to do a Masters. Tyrone Nesby - Tyrone Nesby has been back on the scene, for a couple of reasons. He is back on the interweb, located at t-nes.com, now, with the byline "Tyrone Nesby's School Of Ballerz". He is trying to get his son in the rap game. His Twitter account further describes him as a "private basketball mentor." And he also has an online talk show. But the website for the Be Your Own Sports Agent venture, of which he had at least a piece, no longer exists. And his child support strife continues; last month Nesby pleaded guilty to owing $977,402.05 in unpaid support. That's a lot of money. To brighten the mood, here's some music by Tyrone Nesby. Moochie Norris - Moochie Norris can often be found in a gym in the Houston area called "Stallions." As of December, he featured for the gym's men's basketball team, who were playing ABA opponent, but who did not appear to be in the ABA. Fabricio Oberto - Fabricio Oberto retired at the very start of this season due to a heart defect. In February, it was announced that he may sign with Argentian team Atenas, with whom he had began his career; however, in March, Oberto declined the move in favour of "travelling to Europe." He is now back in Argentina, staging basketball clinics as a part of a wider social development project, and may yet play for the next installment of the Argentine national team. Kevin Ollie - Ollie retired this past offseason and became an assistant coach at UConn. With various factors possibly influencing the length of Jim Calhoun's stay, Ollie's long term security could go either way. Michael Olowokandi - Cannot be traced, despite it all. Greg Ostertag - On 10th of September, it was reported that the D-League's Texas Legends were looking at the possibility of bringing in Ostertag as either a player, an assistant coach, or both. Neither happened. Bo Outlaw - Outlaw remains a community ambassador for the Magic. Robert Pack - Pack was an assistant coach for the New Orleans Hornets last season, and this season has taken the same gig at the L.A. Clippers. Here's Robert Pack in his final playing days, throwing a mean elbow. David Padgett - After a short professional career, David Padgett retired and returned to Louisville as an assistant strength coach. Cherokee Parks - Parks owns a punk club in his home town of Huntingdon Beach. Andre Patterson - The former Tennessee and L.A. D-Fenders forward cannot be traced. As for his namesake, Indiana's Andrae Patterson; he is at Texas Arlington university, majoring in criminal justice and serving as a graduate assistant. Gary Payton - Payton was removed from TNT's coverage after only one year. He now mixes up his time campaigning for an NBA return to Seattle, working out prospects, and talking. Anthony Peeler - Upon retiring, Anthony Peeler went to Virginia Union to complete his degree, and helped out as an assistant coach. Peeler was also a coach in China's summer time league (the NBL) with a team called ShenYang, and now wants an assistant coach's job at his alma mater, Missouri, who are building a new staff. Ben Pepper - Ben Pepper retired after the 2008 season after 12 NBL seasons. But now, he's back playing again. For the last two years, Pepper has joined up with his home town team, the Geraldton Buccaneers, who play in Australia's second tier, Western Australia-centic, semi-pro summer time State Basketball League. Pepper averages 19.8 points and 10.8 rebounds. Eric Piatkowski - Eric Piatkowski does colour analysis for Nebraska games on Fox Sports Midwest. Kevin Pittsnogle - Pittsnogle has retired for the second time. He retired the first time in late 2008, after a thyroid problem caused his weight to balloon, and became a middle school teacher, also volunteering as an assistant on the school's basketball team. When the thyroid problem was cured, and his weight gain curtailed, Pittsnogle made a comeback in the D-League for the 2009-10 season with the Albuquerque Thunderbirds. However, Pittsnogle made it only as far as February before being released for personal reasons. At least, that was the team's version of events - Pittsnogle's family's opinion is somewhat different.
Pittsnogle's sister, Erika Blaylock, complained to the NBA Development League about an incident that allegedly took place during a game on Feb. 6 at Tingley Coliseum. Blaylock claimed in an e-mail dated Feb. 9 and addressed to Chris Alpert, the D-League's vice president of basketball operations and player personnel, that T-Birds co-owner Jackie Bregman said "the West Virginia trailer parks are empty," a notso-subtle jab at Kevin's family seated in the stands. Pittsnogle's mother, wife and two kids were seated in the first row behind the Albuquerque bench. Blaylock informed Alpert that the players and several people sitting near the T-Birds bench heard Bregman's comments. So did Pittsnogle's family. Sam Bregman, Jackie's wife and team co-owner, vehemently denied the claims. "That's absolutely not true," he said. "All I'll say is I wish Kevin Pittsnogle the best of luck in the future."
Whatever happened, Pittsnogle is once again out of basketball. It is not known whether he returned to teaching. Scot Pollard - Polland works for NBA TV and is writing a book about his career. Olden Polynice - Polynice runs his own personal training service, Next Star Basketball. How does his price list stack up to that of the aforementioned Pat Burke? See for yourself. Mark Pope - Mark Pope moved from being athletics co-ordinator at Georgia to an assistant coach at Wake Forest, behind head coach Jeff Bzdelik and alongside Rusty Larue. Vitaly Potapenko, Walter McCarty and Wesley Person - Last time we checked in Vitaly Potapenko, he was an assistant coach at the D-League's Fort Wayne Mad Ants. Last time we checked in on Walter McCarty, he was an assistant coach for Rick Pitino at Louisville. Both are now assistants at the Indiana Pacers. And both survived when Jim O'Brien got fired. Not so lucky was Wesley Person. After only one season as head coach at Enterprise-Ozark community college, Person was fired after going 8-21. He now owns a bowling alley and skate rink in Alabama called "Sharpshooter." Zeljko Rebraca - Rebraca is now a businessman, having recently opened a fitness centre in his home town of Sombor, within a shopping centre that he had previously invested in. Rebraca's total investment is said to be worth $8 million. Luke Recker - Luke Recker, who retired after the 2009 season, has changed company. He used to be a sales representative at Medtronic Spine & Biologics, and now he's a sales representative at Stryker Instruments. Don Reid - Reid has teamed up with former Pistons employee Mike Ford to open Increase Sports, a youth development program. He also still works for the Pistons as an ambassador. Jason Richards - After further knee setbacks, Richards was forced to retire from professional basketball. He has worked this season with the Pittsburgh men's team as an assistant video co-ordinator and graduate assistant. Cliff Robinson - Cannot be traced. Eddie Robinson - Robinson actually made a basketball comeback this season, appearing in at least two games for ABA team the Oklahoma Stallions, his first action for three and a half years. It did not last long, however. Glenn Robinson - Robinson returned to his home town of Gary, Indiana, where he is revered as something of a hero. Dennis Rodman - In the last month, Rodman has been inducted in the Hall of Fame, and had his number 10 jersey retired by the Pisons. Solid month for Dennis Rodman, who now DJ's for a living. Rodney Rogers - Since his paralysis, Rogers sightings are (inevitably) few and far between. That said, he showed up at Wake Forest last week, armed with a big smile. Jalen Rose - Jalen was briefly suspended by ESPN last month after getting caught for DUI and not informing them. He is now back at work. Malik Rose - Rose does TV work for the Spurs, sometimes as an analyst, sometimes as a colour commentator. Bryon Russell - Russell runs basketball camps, and played last summer for IBL team the L.A. Lightning, averaging 10 points and 5 boards. It is not clear whether he will do so again this summer. Josip Sesar - Josip Sesar practiced with Cibona Zagreb for a while. But nothing came of it, and he remains retired. For now, at least. Paul Shirley - "Working on various writing projects." Wayne Simien - Simien now runs a ministry, "Called to Greatness", which combines basketball and Jesus in a way not involving Larry Bird. Steve Smith - Smith works for NBA TV, usually alongside Rick Kamla. Eric Snow - Snow also used to work for NBA TV, but is now the colour announcer for Sixers games on Comcast Sportsnet. He replaced Ed Pinckney, who joined Rick Brunson and Adrian Griffin as new Bulls assistant coaches. Latrell Sprewell - Latrell recently guest-starred in a linguistics textbook, although through no choice of his own. He has lost his house to foreclosure, his yacht was repossessed due to unpaid debts, and he no longer has access to the children he sought to feed. It is no longer known what he does with his time. But it is known that he never played professional basketball again. Vladimir Stepania - After many years of ultimately unsuccessful rehab, Vladimir Stepania embraced retirement and went to study at New York University. He subsequently settled in the state, and is now the CEO of Silk Road Flavors, a speciality food importer, which he runs with members of his family. Blake Stepp - Blake Stepp had a couple of cashes at last summer's World Series Of Poker. He also appears to work (or have worked) for a State Farm Insurance branch in the Spokane area an an unspecified role. Michael Stewart - Stewart has assorted business interests. No comeback is planned. Damon Stoudamire - Damon Stoudamire remains with the Grizzlies as an assistant coach. In addition to Salim, add another one to the Damon Stoudamire's Ballplaying Cousins list - Terrence Jones of Kentucky. Erick Strickland - Last time we checked in on Erick Strickland, he worked with the Mavericks in an ambassadorial role. Since that time, he has trained as a priest, begun working as a car salesman at an Acura dealer in Texas, and rekindled his eBay-for-the-rich business, Luxuryboystoys.com, which lay dormant during our last visit but which is now due to launch this month. It is fair to say that Erick Strickland has been exploring many avenues. Rod Strickland - Last time we checked in on Rod Strickland, he had just finished his first season as an assistant coach with Kentucky, and had just been arrested for DUI for (at least) the fourth time. One year on, and John Calipari decided to penalise Rod by making him a special assistant to the head coach instead. That'll teach him. Bob Sura - Last time we checked in on Bob Sura, he owned a Saturn car dealership. Given that Saturn have since gone under, it is unlikely that this is still true. He cannot be traced since the last update. Wally Szczerbiak - Wally has taken a gig providing analysis for CBS's college coverage, whereupon this actually happened: Billy Thomas - Thomas ended his career this past summer, and became boy's head coach at Barstow School in Kansas City. Jake Tsakalidis - Since 2008, when he last played professionally, Tsakalidis has completely disappeared from the map. (Whereby "the map" equals "the internet.") Nick Van Exel - Van Exel resigned his assistant's position at Texas Southern university in the summer to take a position with the Atlanta Hawks as a player development instructor. He made the news for all the wrong reasons in December when his son, also called Nick Van Exel, confessed to accidentally killing his best friend, and is now charged with murder. Keith Van Horn - Van Horn is a stay-at-home dad. Jacque Vaughn - Vaughn stayed close to the man who loves him more than any other, Gregg Popovich. No longer able to justify giving Vaughn a roster spot for his wisdom, Vaughn is now a Spurs assistant coach. For whatever reason, he is not listed as one on the Spurs official roster. He really is one, however. Fred Vinson - Vinson is an assistant coach with the Hornets, specialising in shooting. He had previously worked for the Clippers. When Robert Pack went one way, Vinson went the other. Dajuan Wagner - Dajuan Wagner is also after one last comeback. It does not appear to have begun. Rasheed Wallace - Rasheed quashed any idea of a comeback back in February, yet still lives in Boston. This seems like a good moment for some Rasheed Wallace rapping. Charlie Ward - Upon retirement from basketball, Ward returned to his other passion - football. He is now the boy's head football coach at Westbury Christian School in Texas. He also worked for a time as a football coach with HOPE worldwide Kenya, a charity that aims to improve quality of life in Kenya. Both of these organisations are steeped in Christianity. Clarence Weatherspoon - Weatherspoon runs a record label, 35*35 Entertainment. Chris Webber - In addition to his various business interests and TV work, Webber recently debuted as a colour analyst alongside Dick Stockton on TNT playoff broadcasts. He was quite good, if a bit unrefined. Dick Stockton, however, was terrible. Why does it become impossible for white people to tell black people apart once they turn 60? Bonzi Wells - In his own words, Bonzi Wells is "chillin". Bonzi Wells's famously poor financial decision actually cost him more money than Latrell Sprewell's comparable one cost him. But because Bonzi didn't get any funny quotables about it, it is far less remembered. The lesson, as always - shut up. David Wesley - After retiring, Wesley returned to Baylor to complete his degree, working concurrently as a student manager for the basketball team. This summer, he joined the D-League's expansion Texas Legends as an assistant coach. Robert Whaley - Robert Whaley is currently in prison, sentenced to a minimum of 16 months for his charge of running a drug house, dating back to 2008, for which he was finally arrested last March. On the Michigan government corrections website, Whaley is listed as 45lbs lighter than he was in his playing days. Jahidi White and Chris Whitney - The last time we checked in on these two, they were in business together, with Jahidi simultaneously launching an amusing and short-lived acting career. Little is known of Jahidi since that time, or of the state of their business. but in September, Chris Whitney was hired by the Bobcats as Director of Player Development. Consider for a moment who owns the Bobcats. Aaron Williams - Cannot be traced. Indeed, never has the A-Train able to be traced. In lieu of news, therefore, here's a highlight mix, the first eight seconds of which are devoted to Aaron Williams adjusting himself. Ajani Williams - Journeyman athlete and occasional NBA training camper Ajani Williams is now the president of the Jamaican Basketball Federation, winning his re-election for a second term last month. He also created itextBill, a mobile phone bill payment company. Alvin Williams - After a year as a Raptors assistant coach, Alvin moved upstairs to become the Director of Player Development. Eric Williams - The only news Eric Williams has made for two years has been divorce related. He owns some real estate and a software company. Jay Williams - Williams works as a college basketball analyst for ESPN. His forays into the agency business were short lived. Jerome Williams - Jerome Williams does a bit of everything. Scott Williams - Scott is an analyst for Suns games, and wants to become a coach. Walt Williams - Walt Williams does radio commentary for Maryland games. Corliss Williamson - Corliss Williamson's ascent up the coaching ladder continues; he is now the head coach at Division 1 Central Arkansas. Unfortunately, the Bears went 5-24 in Corliss's debut season, the only wins coming against Hendrix College, Champion Baptist College (who they beat by 71 points), Lyon College, Southeast Louisiana and Chicago State. Rough start. Finally..... Kevin Willis - Willis continues to operate his premium jeans business in Atlanta, Willis & Walker. EDIT: A couple more. Troy Hudson - Hudson now runs Troy Hudson Enterprises, a record label purporting to become a fully fledged media enterprise. Troy has even written about this for the Huffington Post. Oliver Miller - Miller made a comeback last year, catching on with two different PBL teams. After unsuccessful tryouts in Puerto Rico, he did not play anywhere this year, and this very day he made headlines after pistol-whipping someone at a barbecue. A fight over a barbecue. How else was Oliver Miller going to get arrested?

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"The brain behind ShamSports could have been featured in a number of these Twitter lists, but because his website often spends our entire working day lodged in one of our browser tabs we decided to take the boring route and place Mark amongst the professors. Deeks might be the funniest man you've never met, he does exhaustive work with the NBA's salary minutiae and transaction follow-ups, and he's a stone-cold must-follow. Stone-cold fox, too, ladies. Or, some gentlemen."