– Joao Gomes averages 8.3 points and 4.4 rebounds for Leche Rio Breogan Lugo in the Spanish second division. You’re probably wondering who Joao Gomes is. So am I, honestly. In other, more important Gomes news, the Cincinnati Reds signed Jonny Gomes to a minor league contract with an invitation to spring training. Good luck Jonny. Savage everything you see.
– Jamon Gordon was suspended by his German team, the Koeln 99ers, for going to America without permission. I think. (A user’s blog comment also said something about Gordon trashing his flat, which seems like a weird thing to be suspended for, so I’ll assume he did this afterwards.) His replacement is a man called Michael Jordan, and no I’m not making that up. Gordon averaged 13.9 points, 4.2 rebounds, 4.1 assists and 2.7 steals in his nine games with the team.
– Jamont Gordon (not to be confused with Jamon Gordon, despite how blatantly easy that is to do) is signed with Fortitudo Bologna, the team also known as Upim Bologna and GMAC Real Estate Bologna, and formerly known as Skipper Bologna and Climamio Bologna, yet NOT to be confused with La Fortezza Bologna, which is another Italian first division team. All European names are stupid, I tell you. Gordon averages 11.3 points, 3.3 rebounds, 1.5 steals and 2.0 assists in EuroCup play, while playing alongside Gregor Fucka, whose name is still fun to type, even if it has been usurped by Lior Lipshits.
– Brian Grant (not to be confused with Briant Grant, who is someone that I just made up) retired over two years ago and hasn’t been heard from since.
– Devin Green is signed in Ukraine of all places, with Dnipro Dnepropetrovsk. He averages 20.5 points, 7.8 rebounds and 3.3 assists, while being probably the best player in the country.
– Caleb Green averages 13.5 points, 7.2 rebounds and 2.3 assists in EuroChallenge play per game for Dexia’s Midnight Runners in Belgium, along with 13.9 points, 5.3 rebounds and 1 assist in Belgian league play. You may remember Dexia Mons-Hainault (the team’s real name) as being the team that was too good for Dion Dowell. Or you may not.
– Taurean Green is signed with CAI Zaragoza in Spain, averaging 11.4 points and 2.4 assists.
– Orien Greene (not to be confused with Taurean Green, Torien Greene, Orient Greene, or anyone other than himself) is in Holland, playing for the immortally-named MyGuide Amsterdam. Greene averaged 9.8 points, 4.4 rebounds and 2.6 assists in EuroChallenge play, and averages 12.9 points, 4.3 rebounds, 3.3 assists and 2.3 steals in the Dutch league.
– Lynn Greer is a starting guard on the Olympiacos team that leads the Greek league, and that continues to advance in the EuroLeague. Greer averages only 9.6 points in the Greek league, but averages a team-high 12.4 points in the EuroLeague. Yet, supposedly, they want to bring in another guard (Jannero Pargo, Stephon Marbury) anyway. Seems odd.
– Vincent Grier is doing a bit of everything in the French league, averaging 9.8 points, 4.9 rebounds, 2.5 assists, 1.8 steals and 1.2 blocks a game for Cholet Basket. Grier also averaged 8.3 points and 3.2 rebounds in the EuroChallenge. Unfortunately, he hasn’t hit a three all year in either competition, going 0-5 in total, and Grier is also a combined 35-63 from the free throw line in all competition this season. That’s not getting it done as a 6’5 guy, even as one who is basically a playmaking power forward.
– Did they ever rule on whether Eddie Griffin’s death was officially a suicide?
– Rob Griffin was recently cut from his CBA team, which can’t make a man feel good.
– Finally, Adrian Griffin played all preseason with the Bucks, but then was waived just before opening night for Austin Croshere. Unwilling (or unable) to be parted from Scott Skiles, Griffin then immediately became his assistant coach, something that he’s pretty much unofficially been for about four years now. Those two are so CUTE together! *hugs*