With what is unquestionably the largest Adam's Apple in the history of the NBA, a somewhat foppish mop, an aversion to much press attention and the ability to feed 5000 people with merely 5 loaves of bread and two fish, Kirk Hinrich is a solid all around guard.
Kirk can shoot, despite his jumpshot's continued desire to take the occasional fortnight off. He can penetrate to the rim a little bit, despite his weak finishing there, unaided by his apparent dislike for using the backboard on his layups or developing a consistent floater. He grabs some rebounds, despite being smaller than almost everybody else on the court at any given moment. He can steal the ball despite a penchant for reach-in fouls, and he can play a great floor game, as long as there's not 2 minutes to go in a close game. (He's all kinds of bad in the clutch. It kind of hurts a bit.)
Hinrich is quicker than he's given credit for, and can dunk on you if you give him a running start and a mini trampette. But mainly, he's an elite defender, of both point guards and two guards (or, if you're Scott Skiles and you're so inclined, the occasional small forward). Hinrich is regularly matched up against guards far bigger than him, yet his footspeed, footwork and energy level harasses them and generally ruins their day. He's also just straight up sexy, now that he's cut his rookie season hair and stopped looking like an elf.
By the way, a trampette is a term for a mini-trampoline, not a female tramp. That joke comes to your via the genius mind of Ross Noble.
- 17th February, 2009.
Anagram: "CHHIIIRRNKK!!!" The noise made a slightly detuned overdriven bass guitar.
Note: As you can probably tell,
some of the nicknames were made up. Many are genuine, though, and they
are only made up in the instances where a real one couldn't be traced.
Many given nicknames are of common usage, but some are also sourced
from lesser known sources - these sources are not often cited, not because
I hate the people involved, but because there's too many to do so. For
argument's sake, just assume that the unfunny ones are mine.
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