Do not be fooled by the 260lbs measurement on your left: he's not fat, just VERY strong. He was fat for a brief while in 2002, but that's all. Fizer is one of the better dribbling power forwards about, and one of the more skilled scrubs you ever did see.
The thing is, he only plays one way. When he catches the ball, he ain't giving it up. Not without a fight. And in a fight, he'd probably win.
Fizer can score, quite well. But he knows this, and therefore tries to score on every possession. It leads to low percentage shots and many turnovers, as he tries to force the action around him. He really must try to pass, you know. Fizer has a low basketball IQ, and plays with blinkers on, meaning he cannot be distracted by other horses.
Fizer rebounds real well when he tries to, which is kind of rarely. He doesn't play very good defense, and he shoots too many jumpshots. Convinced of his own jumpshot, he lingers way too often around the three point line, and doesn't have much remorse after misses. He also likes to try and bring the ball upcourt, which is funny when it's not for your team.
In college, Fizer used to be successful by outmuscling people. But in the NBA, he can't get away with that as often. Yet he hasn't adapted his game accordingly - it's still one prevalent on strength rather than skill. Which is a shame, because he's skilled. He has good touch, an OK jumper, great handles, and many tattooes. But Fizer is only a role player in the NBA. And that's when he's even in it.
Marcus Fizer is one of my favourite players ever, if not my very favourite. I don't know why, but I don't care why. As a result, he gets a really long profile written about him. That's just how we roll around here.
PS: If you call him a small forward, I will remove your bollocks. It was nothing more than Jerry Krause's PR machine trying to justify his bad pick.
- 6th April, 2009.
Anagram: "Racism furze," a particularly bigoted type of shrub.
Agent: Mark Bartelstein (Priority Sports). Formerly Henry Thomas.
Note: As you can probably tell,
some of the nicknames were made up. Many are genuine, though, and they
are only made up in the instances where a real one couldn't be traced.
Many given nicknames are of common usage, but some are also sourced
from lesser known sources - these sources are not often cited, not because
I hate the people involved, but because there's too many to do so. For
argument's sake, just assume that the unfunny ones are mine.
In the event where more than one agent is listed, this is because the
player has more than one agent. Simple, really. This is rather commonplace
- a lot of times, a player will sign with a big agency, and they will
have both primary and secondary agents from within that agency to handle
their affairs. (Where that happens, the primary agent is listed first.)
Also, foreign players tend to have both American and domestic agents.
Where the details of such are known, they are listed. It's essentially
like a fun multiple choice game, except without the "fun", "multiple
choice" and "game" elements.
Additionally - don't sue. We're only having a laugh. There's no slander
here. Just very bad jokes.
Copyright ShamSports.com, 2005-2009. Every published word on this website
is copyrighted to the website's owner, including (but not limited to)
the really stupid ones that I wish I'd never written.
