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Wednesday, 2 September 2009

Where Are They Now: 2009 Summer League Teams Part 1

It's been roughly two months since summer league started, and most of the players involved have been rehomed now. The following is a list of where everybody currently is, or where they might be going.

This list gets a bit long, so if you want to just skip to your favoured team, you can do so. I'll allow that.



Boston Celtics

My initial summary


- Nick Fazekas: Fazekas has signed in Europe for next year, with Dijon of France. The longer this goes on, the more it looks like Fazekas is never going to get back into the NBA. Even though he led this Celtics summer league team in points and rebounds, the NBA doesn't seem to want to know. If that continues to happen, it'll be.....well, it'll be strange. Just plucking a name randomly out of my arse here, but is there a real reason for Taylor Griffin to be in the NBA but not Nick Fazekas? Not that I know of. Oh well. No biggy.

- J.R. Giddens: Giddens is still with the Celtics, as Boston tried valiantly to convince Indiana that they wanted him as a part of a Marquis Daniels sign and trade. The Pacers rightly refused.

- Lester Hudson: Hudson hasn't signed with the Celtics yet, but it's likely that he will do. The Celtics really should try and find a veteran backup option first, even if the pickings are pretty slim now. But if they were going to do that, they probably would have done it already.

- Coby Karl: Karl remains unsigned. He also played on the Nuggets' summer league team. The Nuggets are publicly in the market for a good shooting two guard. Coby Karl is a good shooting two guard. The Nuggets' head coach is George Karl. George Karl is Coby Karl's dad. It's going to write itself. You can just feel it.

- Chris Lofton: Lofton is unsigned, but won't be returning to Mersin, who have already replaced him with Richie Frahm and Jimmy Baron.

- Bryan Mullins: Southern Illinois's very own Bryan Mullins has signed with JL Bourg Basket, a team in France's second division. Going from the French second division to the NBA is only really possible if you're an athletic 18 year old French forward, so we may not hear from him again. PS: It turns out that Mullins has an Irish passport. This will help his European career greatly.

- Gabe Pruitt: The Celtics waived Pruitt last month, in spite of their need for a point guard, which isn't a glowing endorsement of Gabe's worth. He later worked out for the Grizzlies, but they decided on Marcus Williams instead, which also isn't a glowing endorsement of Pruitt.

- Kevin Rogers: Rogers has signed with Panionios in Greece. Quite a lot of players in this post have gone to Greece, you'll notice. It's the new CBA.

- Mike Sweetney: As genuinely overexcited as I was about Sweetney's return from two years out of the game, it kind of sucked. Sweetney may have lost 40lbs, but that's only because he weighed 360 in the first place. He's still heavier than Colin Farrell's eyebrows, and played only one game before coming down with the classic Sweetney injury of "strained hamstring," not playing again. It's a start, at least, but it's not been a very good one. I still believe, however.

- Robert Swift: Swift had more fouls than rebounds in summer league. He still hasn't done anything for three years, and the mobility has badly, badly gone wrong. Even Danny Ainge doesn't seem to want him any more. Swift is unsigned, and really needs to go to the D-League and start again.

- Bryce Taylor: Taylor has downgraded from Italy to Germany, signing with Telekom Baskets Bonn for this season.

- Bill Walker: Walker is still with the Celtics. He might have been with the Pacers right now, but Indiana decided that obtaining Bill Walker isn't worth being stuck with Tony Allen, J.R. Giggiddens, or both. I agree.

- Darius Washington: Macedonian passport in hand, Washington is back in Europe, playing for Galatasaray in Turkey.




Chicago Bulls

My initial summary


- James Augustine: Despite playing well for the Bulls, Augustine is staying in Spain to play a second season for Gran Canaria.

- Tyrell Biggs: Biggs signed in Greece with AS Trikalla, as have a couple of other people on this list that we'll get to later.

- Brandon Costner: Costner has signed in Belgium with Dexia Mons-Hainaut. There are 9 Americans on the team, which is a bit strange, although due to the wonders of nationalisation, at least three of them have European passports. (Including Kent State's very own Nate Reinking, one of Britain's best guards. Which is like being one of Operation Barbarossa's best tacticians.)

- Chris Davis: I have absolutely nothing to report. Partly because he hasn't signed anywhere that I can find, and partly because it's hard to Google information on someone with such a common name.

- Taj Gibson: Gibson is signed with the Bulls for next year, ready to wow us all. The last time a Bulls fanbase was so unanimously down on a draft pick, that player was Kirk Hinrich. And that worked out all right. Also, I recently watched USC versus Boston College, when Gibson passed like Vlade Divac and didn't miss a shot in a 24 point outing. I feel a bit better about him now.

- Taurean Green: Green has signed with AEK Athens in Greece. However, the team is said to be close to bankruptcy, so he might not stay long.

- Julius Hodge: Remains unsigned. Julius Hodge fact: Julius Hodge was named by his older brother after Julius Erving. It's kind of got that Denis Law/Dennis Bergkamp thing going on. Except in that example, BOTH of them were legends.

- James Johnson: So far in his time with the Bulls, Johnson has added to his kickboxing prowess with an awesome dancing ability. If he turns out to be any good at basketball as well, we'll have ourselves a number to retire.

- Linton Johnson: Johnson was under contract to the Bulls during summer league, signing unguaranteed through 2010 towards the end of last season. He was waived after summer league, though, and remains unsigned. The Sixers were said to be interested, but nothing has come of that. However, despite the Bulls waiving him three weeks prior, Linton still represented the Bulls at a recent charity golf outing, since no one else could be bothered to turn up. Nice man. I'd gladly take him back, if things were different. We just ran out of money and minutes.

- Nick Lewis: Lewis has spent the last two and a half years in the D-League. He's done well, but the D-League pays badly, so he's had to go to France to get this dollar and put work in. He's signed with Roanne to replace Taj Gray.

- Lorenzo Mata-Real: Unsigned. Here's a great quote about, though:

Even if he grew up in California, Lorenzo feels himself 100% Mexican.

If that's not worth a giggidy, then nothing is.

- Bryan Mullins: See Boston entry.

- DeMarcus Nelson: The Bulls waived Nelson when they waived Johnson, and he has since caught on with Air Avellino in Italy.

- Anthony Roberson: Roberson was a third player signed unguaranteed through 2010 who was waived after summer league concluded. My mate Doug reports the amusing story of how new Bulls GM Gar Forman was so visibly offended at how bad Roberson was in summer league, that he couldn't help but swear publicly about it. Good times. Also, he's a sexpest. (Anthony Roberson, that is. Not Gar Forman.)

- Josh Shipp: Shipp is signed in Turkey with Bornova Bld, alongside Kedrick Brown and Frank Elegar. They'll probably have fun highlight reels.

- A.D. Vassallo: Vassallo didn't play with the Bulls summer league team in the end as he'd sign in France with Paris-Levallois. This hasn't changed.

- Luke Zeller: Zeller has signed in Japan with a team called the Shiga Lakestars in the BJ League. (Giggidy.) If you're wondering if signing in Japan is anything like signing in China or Korea, it isn't.




Cleveland Cavaliers

My initial summary


- Christian Eyenga: Eyenga signed a three year extension with DKV Joventut Badalona, so we won't be seeing him in the NBA for a good long time yet. Would the Cavs prefer Dante Cunningham or DeJuan Blair or Jermaine Taylor with that pick right now? I'm going to go ahead and say yes.

- Jamont Gordon: Gordon has signed with Cibona Zagreb in Croatia.

- Danny Green: It took a while, but Green has now signed with the Cavaliers. Two year minimum salary contract; first year $140,000 guaranteed, second year $125,000 guaranteed becoming fully guaranteed if he makes the 2010/2011 opening day roster. You heard it all here first.

- David Harrison: Harrison is unsigned and I haven't heard a single rumour about a single team wanting him.

- Robert Hite: Hite is signed in Italy with the team formerly known as Premiata Montegranaro. They're now known as Sigma Coatings Montegranaro. Somewhere on the web, someone should make a list of the history of team's names, to help stave off the confusion. And inevitably, that person's going to end up being me, isn't it?

- Darnell Jackson: Jackson is still on the Cavs roster, but his contract is completely guaranteed. He might be all right, though, because the Cavs have only 14 under contract, even when you include him and Jawad Williams. It's not like they're having a particularly dynamic offseason and need all the roster spots they can get.

- Tarence Kinsey: Unlike Jackson and Williams, Kinsey DID get waived, probably because he had a contract guarantee date. He has since signed in Turkey with Fenerbahce; Kinsey signed a two year deal with a third option season, which might be the death knell for his NBA career.

- Leo Lyons: Lyons has signed with Hapoel Migdal Jerusalem, the Israeli team that has fallen from grace ever since Mario Austin left them. And Lyons is no Mario Austin.

- Maureece Rice: A man whose inability to spell his own first name is somewhat justified, Rice is unsigned, and might be a reasonable expectation to return to the D-League next year. To be honest, I've been meaning to look into how the D-League offseason works, but haven't done so yet. Anyone willing to assist can email me at the usual address.

- Jawad Williams: See; Jackson, Darnell.




Dallas Mavericks

My initial summary


- Alfred Aboya: "The Tribe" is unsigned, and Dallas probably won't be bringing him to camp after a 40 minute, 3 point, 5 rebound, 7 turnover, 9 foul summer league performance. (See what I did with the nickname there? I will now eat my own face out of shame.)

- Rodrigue Beaubois: In the early going - so early that we haven't played a game yet - Beaubois looks like being a steal in the late first round. Dallas hasn't had one of these for a while (in fact, their recent draft record overall is really qutie poor), but the last time they did get a steal, it was Josh Howard, the last first round pick in 2003. So when they hit, they really hit.

- Andre Brown: If Brown hasn't spent his whole summer at the free throw line, he's completely gotten his priorities wrong. He has some offensive talent, which is why he keeps getting back into the league, but his FT% is always roughly equal to his FG%. And the 18% from the line that he shot in summer league would suggest that nothing's changed. He remains unsigned.

- Nick Calathes: Calathes signed with Panathinaikos even before he was drafted, so there's no real news to report here.

- Henry Dugat: Dugat is unsigned. Not a whisper. Didn't even play for the Mavericks in summer league, after all that. Maybe he's dead.

- Shan Foster: Foster is unsigned. He shot the ball well in summer league, and he's a specialist shooter, so maybe he'll come to camp with the Mavericks. But they're out of room, with 17 players under contract already. So he probably shouldn't.

- Mickael Gelabale: Gelabale was involved in a little rum-do last month. He agreed to sign with Alicante Lucentum in Spain's ACB for 400,000 Euros, but when he turned up to sign the contract, he found that the agreement was for 50,000 Euros less than what he'd agreed to. So he refused to sign, fired his agent, and is now looking for an NBA gig. He has ruled out rejoining the D-League, apparently.

- Herbert Hill: Hill has parlayed a decent summer league outing into absolutely nothing at all. He remains unsigned.

- Quinton Hosley: Unknown. I'll report it when it happens.

- Luke Jackson: Jackson started every game for the Mavericks in summer league, but played badly, still not being able to shoot at the NBA level for no obvious reason. He has since signed with Carife Ferrara in Italy. Does that mark the end of Luke Jackson's NBA career. Probably.

- Nathan Jawai: Jawai is still with the Mavericks, but he's one of 17. He has the comparative insurance of a guaranteed contract, but the Mavericks have swallowed bigger ones than that before. The Mavericks need a centre, and Jawai is that, but other candidates to be cut (Greg Buckner, Shawne Williams, Kris Humphries) may all have their uses as trade assets. If a team out there wants to trade a good 8 figure salaried player to sale a hell of a lot of money, Dallas can be right there with a package of Buckner, Williams and Drew Gooden. That's what they're banking on, it looks like. If such a deal happens, Jawai might be all right. If it doesn't, he's probably cut.

- Curtis Jerrells: Jerrells has agreed to sign with the Pistons, but hasn't done it yet.

- Bryson McKenzie: Dear Bryson McKenzie's agent; I am really sorry that you don't think I was nice enough about your client the first time around. I'm sorry. Really. I'm so fucking sorry. And I can't WAIT until he tears up the IBL again.

- Aaron Miles: Unsigned. No stupid follow-up comment, either. Unless that one counts.

- Ahmad Nivins: Nivins is signed with Basquet Manresa in Spain, alongside Hawks draftee Sergiy Gladyr. Basquet Manresa used to be known as Ricoh Manresa. Add them to the name change list. (Also, I like the -qu instead of the -k. We might have to make that mandatory.)

- K.C. Rivers: Rivers, who didn't play for the Mavs, has signed with Associazione Basket Latina, an Italian second division team that I've never heard of.

- Damjan Rudez: Rudez was named as a very late addition to the Mavericks summer league roster, and apparently no one told him, because he didn't play a minute for them. He is signed for next year with Cedevita Zagreb, alongside absolutely nobody that you've heard of. Unless you've heard of Elzie Bibbs. (Former Washington General, apparently. That lucky man.)

- Moussa Seck: I have no news on Moussa Seck, who presumably is going back to the Montegranaro system for about 8 more years of development. But the Mavericks apparently really fell in love with him, so much so that they gave him 4 minutes of PT. Then again, this is the team that gave up a first round draft pick for Pavel Podkolzin. There's something about that 7'3 barrier that gets them unfortunately erect. (Great name for a racehorse, that.) By the way, that surrendered first rounder later became Linas Kleiza. Whoops.

- Trent Strickland: Strickland will be playing basquetball next season for AEK Larnacas in Cyprus. Presumably, Cyprus pays well.




Denver Nuggets

My initial summary


- Derrick Byars: Byars is unsigned, and looks to be a candidate for a return to the D-League, after being one of the better players in it last year. Might even get a training camp spot.

- Dontaye Draper: Unattatched and looking. Like me.

- Ronald Dupree: In his six year professional career, Ronald Dupree has never played outside of America. Seattle was as close as he got. This hasn't changed; he's not signed in Europe for next year, and looks like an inevitable training camp/D-League shoe-in. Good luck Doop.

- C.J. Giles: Giles has signed for next season with Smart Gilas in the Philippines. Smart Gilas are a weird team that aren't even really a club; check this for the details. As a part of the move, Giles will soon receive a Philippines passport.

- Richard Hendrix: Hendrix had a decent summer league for Denver, and a very good one for Orlando. Yet despite producing everywhere he's been (giggidy), Hendrix is not in the NBA. Instead he's in Spain with CB Granada. Shame.

- Coby Karl: I'm telling you. It's happening. The Nuggets reportedly really want Wally Szczerbiak, and Rashad McCants is having a workout with them later this week, but it's just a smokescreen. It's going to be Coby. It has to be. What's the point of having a dad as a coach if he can't get you the gig? My dad does my car insurance, after all. It's the way of the world.

- Tywon Lawson: I'm willing to back down a bit on my stance that Lawson is not greatly inferior to Jonny Flynn. But only a bit. Lawson's still good.

- Kareem Rush: After scoring 54 points on 58 shots last year, even worse than his already shocking career ratio of 1.012 points per shot, the league may have finally figured out that Rush isn't actually a good shooting role player after all. He remains unsigned.

- Cedric Simmons: Simmons, one of the worst first round draft picks of the decade, is out of the NBA. He is signed with Peristeri in Greece, a team that just got promoted to the first division.

- Sonny Weems: Weems has been traded twice this summer; first from Denver to Milwaukee, and then from Milwaukee to Toronto, where he will replace Joey Graham. (And in more ways than one, too; Weems looks more like Joey Graham than Stephen Graham does.) His contract guarantee date has now passed, so he'll be sticking around somewhere.




Detroit Pistons

My initial summary


- Michael Bramos: Bramos did exactly what a fringe NBA player with a Greek passport should do; he went to Greece. He signed a two year deal with DASH Peristeri Athens, just like Simmons above.

- Will Bynum: The Pistons have lots of faith in Will Bynum, so much so that they're probably not going to sign a third point guard (unless Curtis Jerrells shows something quickly). That might not seem like a big deal, but if you've seen Ben Gordon play point guard, it is.

- Austin Daye: Daye is signed, and actually signed waaaaaaaay before the press conference which said that he'd signed. It happens like that sometimes.

- Marquise Gray: Gray was a very late addition to the Pistons squad, getting the gig basically only because he was from Michigan State (for whom he averaged a hot and spicy 3/3 last year). He had 7 points and 6 fouls in his one summer league game, and is currently unsigned. Apparently he had offers from Israel, France and Germany, but nothing has come of any of them yet.

- Ibrahim Jaaber: Jaabar was a surprise inclusion on the Pistons summer league roster. Given his successful European career recently, he didn't seem to need to be here. Apparently he realised this as well, because he didn't turn up, and he'll stay with Lottomatica Roma for at least one more season.

- Jonas Jerebko: Jerebko is signed with the Pistons, to a two year minimum salary contract. First year guaranteed, second year 50% guaranteed.

- Dwayne Jones: Jones is unsigned. He often is around this time of year, and it's usually because he has a training camp gig lined up somewhere. But I haven't heard anything about that this time.

- Andre Owens: Bulgarian international Owens is signed in Turkey with Turk Telekom Ankara. Hurtling towards 30 and now owning a European passport, Owens' NBA career may be over with.

- Jeremy Pargo: Jeremy is signed with Altshuler Saham Galil Gilboa in Israel.

- Trent Plaisted: It was initially reported that Plaisted had signed with Reggio Emilia in Italy's second division, but he didn't. Instead, Plaisted is one of only two non-Croats signed next season with KK Zadar in Croatia. The other one.......we'll get to him later.

- Walter Sharpe: Sharpe is currently a member of the Bucks, after being traded salary dumped on Denver and then forwarded on as a part of the completely unnecessary Malik Allen trade. But his stay in Milwaukee might not last too long. While his guaranteed contract works in his favour, the depth chart is against him; Milwaukee already has Ersan Ilyasova, Joe Alexander, Cucumber A Moute and Hakim Warrick in the forward rotation, with others such as Carlos Delfino and Francisco Elson able to help out if necessary. Sharpe also played like arse gravy last year, which won't help his case. And the Bucks also have 16 players under contract right now. Walter's probably 16th.

- Sean Singletary: Singletary was a very late addition to the Pistons summer league roster. Will Bynum didn't play and Jaaber didn't turn up, so Singletary started all 5 games. He must have felt that he had the inside track on the Pistons' third point guard spot. But now it appears that he's lost out to Curtis Jerrells, who wasn't even with the Pistons SL team. Tough break. Singletary is unsigned.

- Dajuan Summers: Summers has also signed with the Pistons for the minimum. First year guaranteed, second year $500,000 guaranteed. Since $500,000 represents the majority of his second year salary, expect him to be around for both years.

- Clay Tucker: Tucker is signed with DKV Joventut Badalona. Ricky Rubio out, Clay Tucker in. A roughly equal trade-off there.

- Travis Walton: Like Gray, Walton was a late addition to the team solely off of his Michigan State experience. Unlike Gray, he didn't play at all. Walton has now signed in the basketball haven of Switzerland with the Lugano Tigers.

- Deron Washington: 2008 second rounder Washington has signed with the team, too, to a $250,000 guaranteed rookie minimum contract. He should be there until at least the deadline, and probably beyond.




Golden State Warriors

My initial summary


- Connor Atchley: Atchley totalled 25 points, 14 rebounds, 2 blocks and 17 fouls in 4 summer league games, which isn't a very Connor Atchley-type of performance. He is currently unsigned. He sure won't be a Warrior.

- Stephen Curry: I watched Davidson versus Butler last week. You know, the ESPN-televised game in which a still-gimpy Curry went about 6 for 48. I just thought I'd mention this in lieu of saying anything interesting. (By the way, Gordon Hayward = brilliant.)

- Jermareo Davidson: The Warriors waived Jermareo Davidson last month. The Warriors signed Mikki Moore last night. The two play relatively similarly, and both kind of suck. So why not have the younger guy? Is having Devean George and Mikki Moore really better than having Jermareo Davidson and Marco Belinelli? Well, OK. If you say so. Davidson is currently unsigned, by the way.

- Othello Hunter: Hunter has agreed to return to the Hawks for training camp this year. There's a good chance he makes it beyond then too.

- Lawrence Hill: Did you watch the Warriors in summer league and get endlessly confused between Lawrence Hill and Quan Prowell? Me too. If you did, Hill is the one that wanted to be remembered as a shooter. He is currently unsigned.

- Joe Ingles: Ingles has left Australia and signed with CB Granada in Spain.

- Jared Jordan: Jordan signed with Telekom Baskets Bonn in Germany. I read an interview somewhere where he said the NBA remained a dream, but he needs to start earning in the mean time. If that was just a more tactful way of saying "I'm probably not taking the optimal route to the NBA right here," he's right.

- Acie Law: There's 82 games left in Acie Law's NBA career. 55 of them may well be spent on the inactive list. This may well be it. Give them hell, Ace. For a change.

- Cartier Martin: Martin signed in Italy with Benetton Treviso last month. He appear so be having a bit of girl trouble, though.

- Anthony Morrow: Morrow averaged 25 points per game in summer league, second best in the entire competition. Strangely, it was also the second best on his team. There's absolutely no doubt that Morrow will be in the NBA, not only for this year but for a while yet; the only question is what kind of contract he gets next year.

- Quan Prowell: Prowell is signed with Paris-Levallois in France for next year. Hi Ann!

- Anthony Randolph: There are plenty of people who write plenty of pieces talking about the plenty of examples of the Warriors plentiful mismanagement these last two years. Here's just one example for the hell of it; Don Nelson told Anthony Randolph to seek a trade last year. Apparently the fact that he's everything the franchise needs was completely lost on Nellie, who seems to think HE is everything the franchise needs. Bad times.

- Lawrence Roberts: I got nothing. Nothing but love, anyway.

- Jamal Sampson: Sampson outplayed Atchley and Davidson in summer league, which sounds more impressive than the 3/4 he averaged. If he ever had a chance - and he probably didn't - then Mikki Moore just took it.




Houston Rockets

My initial summary


- Hassan Adams: Adams is unsigned. He also recently didn't turn up to an Arizona vs Arizona State charity game that he had committed to attend. He may have had an excuse, but we'll just assume he's evil.

- Rodrique Benson: Benson is also unsigned, but he is working on a mixtape right now. So that's a solid excuse.

- Chase Budinger: Budinger signed a four year, $3,332,457 contract with the Rocquettes, the first two years of which are fully guaranteed, and the final two years of which are fully unguaranteed. Why the tax threatened Rockets gave him such a big pay hike above the minimum in the first year is a little strange, considering Budinger's lack of leverage in the situation. I guess they're just nice.

- Will Conroy: Conroy is unsigned after his 26.5ppg/8.0apg season last year. He may be angling to go back to the D-League again. If he is, then I don't get why, because he's spent the best part of 4 years there. He needs to start getting paid. Maybe he has a camp invite out there somewhere.

- Marcus Cousin: Cousin was only on the roster because he's a University of Houston grad. He didn't play in a game for the Rockets and is now signed with Mersin in Turkey.

- Joey Dorsey: Dorsey finally showed something in summer league, averaging a prime Ben Wallace-like 14.8 rebounds and 2.6 blocks in only 31 minutes a game. The turnover and foul numbers were very high, but it's a start. There's plenty of minutes available for Dorsey this year, if he can earn them.

- Charles Gaines: Gaines is unsigned.

- Mike Green: Green won David Thorpe's heart in summer league, but not a training camp spot. He's now in Belgium with Belgacom Liege.

- Maarty Leunen: Leunen's never going to make the Rockets team, and I hope he knows that. This won't stop him from a good European career, though, and Leunen is signed with NGC Cantu for next year.

- Brad Newley: See above, pretty much, except Newley is in Turkey with Besiktas.

- Jermaine Taylor: See Budinger. Taylor signed exactly the same deal. Although that's more standard when you're picked 32nd than when you're picked 44th.

- Garrett Temple: The Rockets freaking love Temple, even in spite of his chronic inability to shoot over 40% (an inability that showed itself once again in summer league). Temple is unsigned, and if the Rockets brought him into training camp, I wouldn't be entirely surprised. But if he then makes the team, I'll be the most surprised I've been since Salma Hayek turned into a monster halfway through From Dusk Till Dawn. (It was a good film until that happened. And then it turned awful.)

- Darryl Watkins: Watkins is unsigned.

- James White: White is signed through next year, and has been for ages, but that doesn't really mean a whole lot. Essentially, he just signed for training camp really really early. The arrivals of Budinger and Taylor may have cost him a spot, although the Rockets are looking to salary dump Brent Barry which should give White one more chance.

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Tuesday, 15 April 2008

Hy-pathetical Situation

You're 49-32, fighting for the 8th seed in the playoffs. The team you're battling is 48-32. Even though you have the tiebreaker, you really need to win your last game to ensure the final spot. And it's not going to be easy. It's All Hands On Dick time, with the playoff intensity needing to be in full swing.

What's the first thing that you need?

A drink, obviously.

What a really stupid time for that. A really, really stupid time. There's never a good time, but this is a particularly stupid one.

If I was earning $13 million this year, I'd get some hired help on the driving. I really would. At the very least, you'd get one of your millions of hangers-on to help you out. That's what they're there for, isn't it? Make them earn their free tickets.

It really is amazingly stupid that DUI's (or DWI's, depending on what state you're in. So to speak.) continue to be so rife in the world of professional sports. And I have no idea why it continues. At least no one died, or crashed while watching porn. So that's something.



In other NBA news, I don't know why this is funny, but it is, and it needs posting, but doesn't merit its own post. So we'll make it an addendum to this one.



I don't do captions. Apply within.

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Reason No. 451 Why The Bulls Suck This Year



They were supposed to lose this game.

But, clearly, they didn't. Not even close, in fact. Rather than lose, the Bulls instead nearly set a franchise record for most points in a regulation game.

Teriffic.

Yet, I can't be annoyed at this. It may not have been the optimum result in terms of the Bulls long term future (it pains me to admit that the one draft spot they could potentially gain from losing out is the most useful thing that could possibly come out of the Bulls disastrous season now), but it was great effing fun, if nothing else. It would have been even more fun had I actually watched the game. I'm sure of that.

More inspiring still was the complete randomness of it. The fact that the Bucks have been a special kind of shit on defense all year is a well documented truth. But the fact that the team with the worst FG% in the league - and by a reasonably comfortable margin - just shot 68% in a game, is friggin' staggering. Especially coming from a team with the cohesiveness of a early morning shit after a night on the Stella, like the Bulls currently have.

However, all the time the score was being run up, I couldn't help but think that it wasn't enough. 151 points is fan-freakin'-tastic, but it pales compared to the 168 points that Denver put up earlier this season. And this made me disappointed - since when was 151 points 'remarkable', but not league leading?

It's a damn good period of the NBA's history that we currently live in where things like this can happen.



Also, some individual performances need some praise and some scorn. The statline of Ramon Sessions no doubt jumps at you. His 24 assists is not quite an NBA rookie record, for the record is 25, jointly held by Nate McMillan and some guy called Ernie DiGregorio. But it's definitely the rookie record of recent times, surpassing Jamaal Tinsley's rookie effort of 23 in a game, back in the days when he used to pass first. (Note: I am going off of memory here, and didn't look to check if any rookie had topped that mark since.) So this effort pushes Tinsley further out of sight and out of mind, which can only be a good thing.

Unfortunately, to look at Sessions's effort, properly, you need some context. The first 20+ point and 20+ assist game in Bucks history was undermined somewhat by Chris Duhon's statline of 15 assists with 0 turnovers, along with scoring 22 points on 9 shots. All of this took place in 14 less mintes than what Sessions played. Had he played the same amount of minutes as Sessions (44), he almost certainly would have had better overall numbers than Sessions did.

And this is a bad thing, because this is Chris Duhon we're talking about. Chris Duhon, in his penultimate game as a Chicago Bull, no less. Duhon's tenure with the Bulls has always been highlighted by the occasional staggeringly brilliant performance, be it his triple double versus Charlotte, his eight made three pointers versus Atlanta, or his 38 point game versus the Warriors this season. Every four months or so, he turns in a performance so dominating that you can't help but wonder what it is that makes him so shit for the other 80 games of the season. And tonight, he has done this again. But this is no excuse for Sessions to let him put up numbers of such magnitude - it is, after all, Chris Duhon. At some point, you have to make him look like the shitty point guard that he is.

Also, who would have thought that one of the most high scoring games of the past decade could have possibly involved Michael Ruffin logging significant minutes? (I had an interesting follow-up point to this, but Muffin ruined it by scoring the final basket of the game, to finish with a mesmeric 2 points. Bastard. By the way, for those who still haven't got the memo, Michael Ruffin is the worst offensive player of all time. His profile proves this.)

For points per shot fans such as myself, this game was a stunner. For Bulls fans such as myself, this game was polarising. For Bucks fans, this game was more of the same - you know what you're getting by now, and you don't like it, but at least Sessions gives you false hope. (I'd trade him by the next deadline if I were you. Sell high. See also: Tinsley, Jamaal.) And for Chris Duhon fans, you get one final chance to see your hero in action for the team that will probably constitute 80% of his entire NBA career.

So, something for everybody there.

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Monday, 17 December 2007

Wow, NBA fans are really spectacularly crap.

On Saturday afternoon, I went to a non-league football match. Football is a sport that we have in this country, which involves people kicking a ball with their foot (hence the name). It's a tremendous sport of flair, innovation and foul language, which unites the whole entire world in its single minded appreciation of how wonderful the beautiful game is.

(There is an American variant out there called "soccer", but it is marred by terrible broadcasting, stupid gimmicks, and a seriously shite standard of play. It is not recommended.)

The game was between Tonbridge Angels and Oxford United, an F.A. Trophy first round match. Oxford United were at home, which meant for us Angels fans a day trip out to a 12,000 seater stadium. For those unaware, Oxford United were good, back in the day. Then they went bankrupt. A man named Kassam saved them, bailed out the finances, and built them a big stadium. But it hasn't done the team much good, and they have since fallen out of the Football League (and also fallen out with Kassam, although they are stuck with the stadium named after him). They're also now flat broke again.

Despite the team not befitting the stadium that houses them, the importance of the event and size of the stadium made it a highly entertaining day out for us visitors. The official attendance for the game was 1547, and if you don't know what having 1547 people in a stadium that seats 12,000 looks like, then either watch the Florida Marlins at home, or look at the picture below:




Of the 1547 people to attend, about 220 were Tonbridge Angels fans who had travelled a helluva long way to support their team. These 220 people gave great voice, and showed the world (or at least, the rest of the world that was there) quite what being a sports fan is about.

Chants were everywhere. The songs were not particularly intelligent, and a lot of them were not politically correct. But dammit, was it fun. Songs included "Tommy Warrinow's Blue And Red Army", "Your Support Is Fucking Shit", "Did you sleep in until half time?", "CRAAAAAAAACK!!!" (toward the Oxford goalkeeper Billy Turley, who once failed a drugs test), "Who needs Mourinho, we've got Tom Warri-low", "Someone nicked your other stand" (in reference to the way that Oxford's stadium has, bizarrely, only three sides), and the mighty "who are we? TONBRIDGE!" chant that aired regularly.

That selection is merely tip-of-the-iceberg type stuff. Songs were being invented on the fly, with about 50 invented in all. The Oxford supporters in the other two stands eventually chimed in, and a call-and-response got going, with the Tonbridge faithful ridiculing the dismal turnout of the Oxford fans which such seminal smashes as "We Forgot You Were Here" and the aforementioned slightly rude one about their support, while Oxford fans responded in kind with jibes at Tonbridge's amateur status.

It was all good natured fun, brought to you by people who actually care about the teams on show. They care so much that they willingly travelled for hours to get to the place, just to stand around outside in the frankly arctic weather, in a largely desolute stadium in the city's ugly industrial suburbs, drinking Bovril out of a paper cup, and shouting for sustinence. The health and safety man may keep ordering you to sit down, but you don't, because you're enthused and genuinely interested in the action. He eventually relents, not wanting to piss on your strawberries. The old man alongside you with mild tourettes screams enthusiastically at any mildly interesting piece of action (usually random shouts of "Hey! Ho!"), and the ambitiously dressed middle aged woman to his right hisses the word "shit!" in a really sinister way every time your team loses possession. At stoppages in play, you chant out your players names, daring them to signal acknowledgement of your chant. And when they do, you woop with joy. You cheer, wail, antagonise, ridicule, toot air horns, throw your apparel with pride, and just generally make your own entertainment, while always fixated on the action.



You don't get any of that in the NBA.

Instead, you get arena music. *BOOM BOOM* "Defense!!!!!", and the like.

You get signs telling you when to make noise, and 'entertainment' ushered onto and off the court with military precision every time play stops for more than 10 seconds.

You get an experience, but you don't get to enjoy yourself. You do what you're told, and you're told to do everything.

There's a reason that Golden State Warriors fans managed to put on such a spectacular showing during their first round playoff matchup against Dallas last year - it's because they gave a shit. And they didn't care who knew it.

The NBA isn't faaaaaaan-tastic until people start being fans. This means passion. And passion doesn't generally involve sitting down, clapping appropriately.

Forget the family experience that the NBA looks for when selling tickets. Let's start stocking these arenas with people who will actually want to be there, and who will follow the action without prompting. Instead of banks of seats filled with people sitting down eating, let's have people up and cheering, singing, bringing atmosphere into a place that's supposed to ooze it from every turnstile. Let's not have 46 minutes of gentle appreciation and two minutes of giving a toss.

If you don't think this is possible in a game of basketball, watch the Euroleague some time.

(And don't sell alcohol at the venues, either. Lest we forget what happened three years ago.)

(By the way, I've never been to an NBA game. This ignorance may or may not be painfully obvious in the above. I hope not.)

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Sunday, 23 September 2007

30 teams in 36 or so days: Golden State

Golden State

Players acquired via free agency or trade:

Austin Croshere (one year minimum)
Troy Hudson (one year minimum)
Kosta Perovic (previous draft pick, 3 years, $5.832 million)




Players acquired via draft:

First round: Brandon Wright (8th overall), Marco Belinelli (18th overall)
Second round: Stephane Lasme (46th overall)



Players retained:

Matt Barnes (re-signed, 1 year, $3 million), Kelenna Azubuike (re-signed, 2 year minimum)




Players departed:

Sarunas Jasikevicius (bought out, to sign in Europe), Adonal Foyle (bought out, signed with Orlando), Mickael Pietrus (unsigned, restricted, will probably re-sign but I didn't know which category to put it in), Zarko Cabarkapa (left unrestricted, unsigned), Josh Powell (left unrestricted, signed with Clippers), Jason Richardson (traded to Charlotte)





Bobbins:

I would like to extend a hearty apology to Golden State Warriors Vice President of Basketball Operations, Chris Mullin. In the early part of his time as GM (I'm not typing "Vice President of Basketball Operations" every time, "GM" will do), I ragged on the bastard somewhat mercilessly for his personel moves. And it seemed justified. Inheriting a pretty poor team. Mullin did not do much to improve that, but did spend over a quarter of a billion dollars on re-signing his core players. In an 18 month period from his hiring in April 2004 to October 2005, Mullin gave out enormous contracts to Mike Dunleavy Jr, Jason Richardson, Troy Murphy, Adonal Foyle and Derek Fisher, contracts which totalled a mindboggling $261 million for only 5 players (two of whom came off the bench). The only surprise was that he didn't give a similarly insane contract to Erick Dampier, a free agent who did get an oversized contract, but with Dallas.

Mullin's excessive spending forced him to then cut some salary, making moves such as having to deal a first round pick along with Eduardo Najera to Denver for next to nothing, just to be able to avoid the tax threshold. He pigeon-holed himself into a corner, having to sacrifice assets to keep within budget, all for a late lottery team. Things were looking bleak, and some people questioned (rather harshly) whether Chris had gotten back on the drink. Those people will go to hell, partly for their poor ethics, but also for just not being funny.

But Chris Mullin and the Golden State Warriors will not go to hell. Somehow - and this surprises no one more than it does me - Mullin has turned the situation around. The contracts of all of the above players have been gotten rid of (while Foyle is still being paid for three more years, his buyout leaves the Warriors paying a not-too-excessive amount to him, and the 30%-ish savings make the buyout an entirely worthwhile venture), and the only questionable contracts remaining are those of Stephen Jackson, Al Harrington and Baron Davis. And in even, in all three instances there, a case could be made that each player is receiving market value, or only a small amount above it.

The Warriors now have the league's 29th highest payroll (not counting Pietrus), which, when phrased more sensibly, means that they have the second lowest payroll around. Players such as Andris Biedrins and Monta Ellis still have big pay days yet to come, but Golden State is now in a position where they can pay the players that deserve big pay days, because they have freed themselves of the players that didn't.

Not just shedding payroll, Mullin has continued to bring in quality players, making very good draft selections such as Biedrins and Ellis to go along with minimum salary finds such as Matt Barnes and Big Lenny Sambuca. He has cleaned out the crap that previously permeated his roster, and continued to pack it with prospects.

And it all began with the can't-miss Baron Davis deal, in which Mullin traded Speedy Claxton and Dale Davis's expiring contract to New Orleans for Davis, who has since had a rebirth of sorts under new Warriors head coach Don Nelson. Despite the occasional slip-up (drafting Patrick O'Bryant and the Mike Montgomery era to name but two), it's been relatively all gravy since then, and the Warriors boast a young and

So well played, Mr Mullin sir. You join an elite group of GM's who can undo previous mistakes without making future ones, and therefore now have distinct seperation between yourself and the McHale/Thomas's of this world. Congratulations.


Now that all that bumlicking is out of the way, let's use less general terms and stick to this past offseason. A relatively tame one given the venom with which it began, Mullin added to his young talent on draft night by obtaining Brandan Wright, Marco Belinelli and Stephane Lasme, all of whom have joined the Warriors straight away. The big savings opened up by moving the salary of Jason Richardson - who was becoming largely expendable away - allow the Warriors more of the previously mentioned financial flexibility that they now enjoy. And as a result, the Warriors can boast a young core that rivals or surpasses that of most other teams in the NBA. They have at least one young talent at every position - often two - with a team crafted to be playoff calbire now, yet even better in the future.

Most importantly, they retained Don Nelson. A frowned-upon signing at the time, Nelson gave the young Warriors team something that they never had before - an identity. They quickly became a fast paced team with a flowing offensive system, not entirely unlike the system previously employed by Nelson during his time at Dallas. This team became one of the better stories in the NBA last year, and scored an upset for ages when they beat Dallas in round one, becoming the first #8 seed to beat a #1 seed in a seven-game series. Which was fun. Where I live, we have an expression for that: "f'in creamed the bastards".

It came apart in the second round, but it still marked a successful season for the franchise, the first for a hell of a long time.

This offseason was of building upon that, to decent effect. The Kevin Garnett whispers came to nothing, but then, that was somewhat expected. You could say that it's something of a disappointment as a fan to hear that Kevin Garnett might be coming to town, yet you wind up with Austin Croshere instead. It's a fair point. But the Warriors have not disappointed in any way, improving their roster slightly and upgrading for the future, while keeping the coach that made last season one to remember.

And what's more, they signed Troy Hudson. I mean, WOW!

(OK, so now I'm taking the piss. But the rest stands.)



Next season:

There is no real reason to suggest that the strategy that got the Warriors to the playoffs last season would not be successful once again. And with only one significant change in the rotation taking place, the Warriors have good continuity going into next season, not least from the return of Nelson. The loss of Jason Richardson should be reasonably offset by the continued improvement of Monta Ellis, the addition of Marco Belinelli (and no I'm not making the obvious surname comparison between him and Don Nelson), and the re-positioning of Stephen Jackson.

Whether the Warriors have the multi-dimensionalness to beat most teams in the playoffs is another question. The addition of Brandan Wright should help their rebounding problem (the Warriors sported the worst rebounding deficiency in the NBA last season, at -5.0), but they remain a poor rebounding and defensive team, once again relying too much upon Andris Biedrins's foul situation to win games. And as any old fart will tell you, these things count double in the playoffs.

Still, win lose or draw, the Warriors and Nellieball will be as entertaining as ever. They won't replicate the storybook nature of last season, but they figure to have a similar level of success, Still outgunned and outsized in the stronger West, the Warriors aren't a home court advantage team, but they're in a better situation for the future than most of their peers.

And it's mainly down to Chris Mullin. Jesus. That's something I'd never thought I would say.

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