Where Are They Now, 2001 Edition; Ernie From Scarface

Last night was the MLB's 80th Annual All-Star Game, an event that saw a Tampa Bay Ray win the MVP award. (Rightly or wrongly, that just happened. Mark it down.)

The night also called for newly elected President Jack O'Barmer to throw out the ceremonial first pitch. His effort wasn't great, but nor was it all that bad, considering he had on such a big bulletproof vest that he looked more like the Michelin Man. Or Tank Abbott.

However, the very sight of seeing a President throwing out the first pitch reminded me of one of the finest first pitches I've ever seen, an offering by ex-President and a prolific drawer of ire, George W. Bush. The following offering comes from the first Major League Baseball game played after the September 11th disaster; I watched it live, and it loses nothing in a re-run 8 years later.



All told, that's a pretty good looking curveball.

But, wait; speaking of good looking, who's that man at the top of the stairs? Rewind back to the 20 second mark; who's this guy?


Closer.


CLOSER.


(Nope, too close.)


I know who that is. I know that face. That's Ernie from Scarface, that is.

No, really; it is.



There you have it, the shocking revelation that Ernie Daniels, the moustachioed henchman and trusted ally of Tony Montana, is actually responsible for matters of natural security.

It's not necessarily a bad thing, really, considering Ernie's staunch loyalty and devotion to protocol is what prevented Tony from shooting his ass in the first place (not shooting in his ass). But it is a bit of a shocker. Especially since I'm pretty sure Ernie died in the film.

Still, though. He's looking well.

(Note: Ernie's surname given here is entirely speculative.)



Bonus: In completely unrelated news that pertains slightly more to the point of this website, the University of Georgia announced the hiring of Mark Pope as athletics co-ordinator. If you take two things that might be worth posting but which don't merit their own post, and put them together in one big cut-and-shut post, then maybe you have yourself a worthwhile post. Maybe.

Where Are They Now, 2009; Part 41

- Olden Polynice has retired, which is perhaps unsurprising given that he's nearly 45 years old, but it took him longer to do than you might think. After retiring, Polynice became a coach for an ABA team, but the job security of a position like that is about six weeks maximum. He has not, as far as I am aware, joined the police force.

- Mark Pope has also retired, and as promised has enrolled in medical school.

- Vitaly Potapenko has also also retired. After falling out of the NBA in 2007 (and looking really quite bad during his last year), Vitaly sat around on the sidelines for a while before signing with Estudiantes in Spain in December 2007. He played 6 games, looked terrible, was quickly waived, and retired after that. End of an era.

- Roger Powell hasn't retired, so that means I'm going to have to actually put some effort into this entry. Powell didn't make the Bulls roster out of preseason, despite a pretty decent showing, and signed in Israel with Hapoel Jerusalem. In 5 EuroChallenge games, Powell averaged 8.6 points and 4.6 rebounds, improving slightly to 9.8 points and 4.5 rebounds in the Israeli league. Powell is a combined 10-39 from three point range in the two competitions, including one 4-4 outing, so his weakness is still his weakness.

- Kasib Powell started the year in China, where he averaged a frankly disappointing 25.8 points, 9.0 rebounds and 3.7 asissts on 59% shooting. He left the team at the beginning of the year and is now back in his natural territory - the D-League. For the Sioux Falls Skyforce, Powell is averaging 15.2 points, 3.5 rebounds and 3.2 assists.

- Carlos Powell is playing for the pricelessly named Inchon ET Land Black Slamer in South Korea. He averages 25.6 points, 6.6 rebounds and 3.9 assists, numbers not too dissimilar from what he averaged in the D-League last year (22.5ppg, 6.4rpg, 4.8apg). Powell was arrested back in May on charges of unlawful possession of a firearm, but I can't find what ultimately became of this. If you know, please let me know.

- Pablo Prigioni is with Tau Vitoria, averaging 6.0 points and 4.4 assists in Euroleague play, alongide 8.4 points and 4.8 assists in Spanish league play. Those numbers are good, even if they might not look it.

- Gorgeous Giorgis Printezis is with Olympiakos, averaging 9.7 points and 2.9 rebounds in 18 minutes per game in the Greek league, alongside 8.8 points and 3.1 rebounds in 17mpg in the Euroleague. Gotta rebound better than that, George, regardless of how brilliant your hairline is. That only gets you so far.

- "Ca$h Money" Laron Profit - whose surname finally justifies my incessant use of that stupid joke - has spent the last year and a half maintaining an on-and-off relationship with an Argentinian team called Libertad Sunchales. It's currently off.

- Ivan Radenovic is playing for Panellinios in Greece, where I watched him this very week. The European game suits Radenovic rather well; he's tall, and a skilled finisher inside, but he's also slower than Rain Man and can only jump over a matchbox if you crushed it flat first and then pumped him full of helium. Nevertheless, Radenovic is averaging 11.7 points and 4.1 rebounds in the Greek league, alongside 14.4 points and 4.7 rebounds in the Eurocup. Those 14.4 points per game form a total of 201 points on only 111 shots, for a scintillating 1.81 points per shot average. If points per shot is a metric that gets you off, like it does to me, then you may want to take a moment to consider those numbers.

- Finally, Igor Rakocevic is not currently in the NBA. But that may well change, as it's been reported that he has a standing offer from an NBA team, speculatively credited to being Houston. Rakocevic's previous NBA stint with the Minnesota Timberwolves didn't go particularly well, as his undersized stature saw him miscast as a point guard, but in the last few years in Europe as a two guard Rakocevic has emerged as one of the best players in the continent. Starting alongside Prigioni in the Tau backcourt, Rakocevic averages 19.7 points per game in the Euroleague, and 20.6 points per game in the Spanish league, numbers that rank first in both the second and third highest standards of basketball competition in the world. Can't argue with that.

Channing Frye's blog

Is worth visiting at least once.

I prayed to God for a miracle and what happened? Free internet in the PDX airport. The time blew by. I looked at all the funny videos from the letter-opening bunny to the daily condensed soup, which I recommend for everyone to watch — it’s hilarious.

I get on the plane sit in my nice comfortable 1st class seat and to my dismay the “bubble gut monster” arose his bubbly badness inside my stomach. What I mean is that I had to lay down a huge fart. If we were outside in the woods or maybe at an all-guys party I would have tore a hole in the universe but I had to hold it. Too many people too soon and I knew it was gonna smell.

Et cetera.

All I ask for from NBA players is a semblance of personality. It's a small ask, yet one often unfulfilled by people professionally trained to be dull and boring. A small bit of personality goes a long way, particularly if you aren't very good. If you're likeable as a person, then by proxy you're more likeable as a player. This theory worked on me for Paul Shirley, Scot Pollard, Mark Pope, Andrew Bogut, Rod Benson, Yao Ming, Jalen Rose, Rasheed Wallace, Jonny Gomes, and even Ron Artest. In my book, you gain invauable bonus points for just not being dull. (Let it be known, though, that you will also lose said points for all animal cruelty charges accrued. So that definitely counts against Ron.)

Similarly, if you're completely humourless, the chances are that I won't even try to enjoy watching you play. This is why I'm always quick to defoul Josh Smith, try to avoid Cavaliers games, and why the Derrick Rose era doesn't hearten me as much as it should. (Michael Beasley is entertaining, and he's good. Let it be known that I wanted him, while also remembering that my opinion on draftees ain't worth a damn thing.)

So every time I learn of an NBA player showing signs of a personality without a hint of remorse, I'm all for you. Well done, Mr Frye. Keep writing and not being Josh Smith.

(By the way, the above "personality = good" theory doesn't particularly apply to Gilbert Arenas. He's just interfering. Points gained for trying, points lost for being annoying.)

Where Are They Now? Part 30

Apologies for the site disappearing for 48 hours. Truth be told, I have no idea what happened. I went to bed, and it was working. I got up, and it wasn't. Turns out the hosting company kinda broke something on their end, but all is well now.

Also, you may have found that the home page consisted of nothing more than the word "hello" for a few hours. That wasn't me who did that, but the nameless technician mending it. It freaked the shit out of me when I saw it. But never mind, all is now good and that. Call off the search.

---

Mark Pope - Legend - always said that he was going to go to medical school once his NBA career had finished, so I guess he's done exactly that.

Vitaly Potapenko fell out of the NBA in the summer of 2007, and wound up in Europe, where he averages a mere 5.3 points and 2.5 rebounds for Estudiantes in Spain, alongside Florent Pietrus, wife of Mickael.

Roger Powell is playing for Teramo in Italy, where he averages 13 points and about half an assist per game.

Carlos Powell was signed by the Warriors for training camp this season, but was an early cut. They may have made a mistake here, though. The Warriors ended up prefering to own such players as Austin Croshere, Troy Hudson and Chris Webber over Powell, all of whom did pretty much nothing for the team. Meanwhile, Powell went to the D-League, played for the Dakota Wizards, and absolutely beasted, averaging 22.5 points, 6.4 rebounds and 4.8 assists per game, on 49% shooting, 40% from three point range. That's some pretty epic numbers right there. The 4 turnovers a game that go with all that are a lot, but if he was perfect he wouldn't be in the D-League. I'd kind of expect a training camp invite after a season like that, and a greatly improved chance of sticking around this time.

Giorgos Printezis, whose rights are owned by the Raptors, is playing for Olympiakos in Greece, alongside the many other players already mentioned as playing there. These include Lynn Greer, Arvydas Macijauskas, Qyntel Woods , Jake Tsakalidis, Sofoklis Schortsanitis, Reinaldas Seibutis and Loukas Mavrokefalidis. Based on that list, I apparently have to rattle off this list 4 more times yet. Ah well. Printezis averages about 9 points and 4.5 rebounds.

Cult hero Laron Profit averaged 11 points and 4 rebounds for Libertad, the Argentinian champions.

Ivan Radenovic is playing for Akasvayu Girona in Spain, where he averages 4.5 points and 2 rebounds. I watched an interview with him the other day, and it turns out that he speaks good English. So that's nice. Somewhat unsurprising given that he went to Arizona, but I didn't know that at the time, hence why it surprised me. Shame about his play, though.

Milovan Rakovic, whose rights are owned by the Magic, plays for Spartak Moscow, alongside Rafael Araujo and Joe Smith. (Not THE Joe Smith, obviously.) As with all Russian teams, I haveth no stats.

Pedro Juan Branches has gone back to Puerto Rico to star. He averages 19.2 points and 10.4 rebounds for a team called Caguas.

Allan Ray spent the season with Lomattica Roma in Italy, where he got paid handsomely for a 13 points 2 assist average. His teammate was Gregor Fucka. I've said it before, and I'll say it as often as I feel like it. Gregor Fucka Gregor Fucka Gregor Fucka Gregor Fucka. Gregor Fucka. Allan Ray. Gregor Fucka.

You, like I, may have thought that Zeljko Rebraca retired. He sure as hell spent a long time out with a chronic back complaint, and the Clippers ate some guaranteed money to get his roster spot. Bit apparently things weren't all that bleak, as the now-35 year old Zelly just poured in a part-season for Valencia (Spain) in which he totalled 8 points in three games. Clearly back to his best there. The lesson, as always - inactive lists can be deceiving.

Justin Reed is a member of the Bakersfield Jam of the D-League, where he averages an impressive 20.3 points, 7.1 rebounds and 3.7 assists a game. Not bad from a hustle player.