Where Are They Now, 2009; Part 50

- D.J. Strawberry is with Fortitudo Bologna, the same team as GMAC Bologna, but not the same team as La Fortezza Bologna. Can't stress that enough. Strawberry averages 14.7 points, 2.7 rebounds and 1.5 assists in Eurocup play, alongside 13.8 points, 3.5 rebounds and 1.2 assists in the Italian league. Strawberry is a combined 16 of 76 from the three point line, confirming once again that his major weakness is still a weakness.

- Brad Stricker has been on and off the Dakota Wizards roster all year, averaging 11 minutes, 2.6 points, 2.3 rebounds and 2.1 fouls per game. His playing time wasn't exactly consistent; his last ten games with the Wizards saw him play 5, 4, 3, 5, 2, 2, 8, 30, and 8 minutes respectively. Stricker eventually asked the Wizards for an unconditional release, as he wanted to play for a team closer to his home due to some family issue. He was granted it, and now plays for the Albuquerque Thunderbirds, where he averages 17.6 minutes, 3.6 points, 3.6 fouls, 1.8 rebounds and 1.0 blocks per game.

- Erick Strickland now works for the Mavericks in a capacity that I'm too confused to understand. Here's Erick himself with an explanation. Did you know that Erick Strickland's real first name is Demerick? Me neither. Fun fact.

- Rod Strickland is the director of basketball operations for the University of Memphis, while also taking classes there to finish his degree. Ever since his hire in 2006, Memphis have gone on to be slightly brilliant. Coincidence? Maybe. Maybe not. But, since Strickland's role entails things like organising travel plans, checking on student's academic scores, and scheduling visits for recruits, it probably is.

- Curtis Sumpter averages 10.8 points and 5.9 rebounds for Chorale de Roanne Basket, the third best team in France and the subject of a slightly seminal 1978 song by The Police.

- Bruno Sundov this week left Cibona Zagreb (in Zagreb) to join Vive Menorca (in Menorca). He also started the season with ASK Riga in Latvia. Sundov has not yet played for Menorca (who also feature Frederic Weis, so that's going to be a hell of a frontcourt), and he totalled only 16 points, 5 rebounds and 8 fouls in his 30 total minutes for Cibona in the Adriatic league (36 minutes, 13 points, 8 rebounds, 5 fouls in the Euroleague). However, for Riga, Sundov's numbers shot up to 18.8 points and 8.8 rebounds in the Eurocup, along with 14.8 points and 4.5 rebounds in the Baltic league. Somehow, though, the 7'3 Sundov has managed to block only 8 shots all season, in a combined 33 games and 621 minutes.

- Allegedly, Bob Sura's girlfriend stabbed him with some keys when she found him at a restaurant with another woman. These allegations and many more can be found here. Read with caution.

- Mike Sweetney is missing. Not just missing in that I can't find out anything about him, and not "inform the police" kind of missing. Just sort of missing. After never losing the necessary weight, even when the guaranteed money ran out, Sweetney's contract expired with the Bulls and he became a free agent in the summer of 2007. He has not been heard from since, and has not played anywhere, not even in summer league. Sam Smith mentioned in a column at some point last season that not even the players association could find him any more. Not even Facebook can help us on this one. I hope he's all right. If you know anything about Mike's whereabouts and well-being, let me know.

- Szymon Szewczyk - another one of those turn-of-the-century "let's draft a Euro! You never know!" second rounders, this one by the Milwaukee Bucks - is still in Russia with Lokomotiv Rostok. He's doing rather well at a decent standard of basketball, averaging 14.5 points and 7.5 rebounds per game in the EuroChallenge, as well as 12.3 points and 6.7 rebounds in the Russian Superleague. However, he's also now 26 years old, and was picked with the 35th pick, so it's still been one hell of a reach. (Still, it could have been worse. Players picked after Zoochick that year included Nedzad Sinanovic, Paccelis Morlende, Slavko Vranes, Ramon Van Der Hare and Xue Yuyang. You know about the lack of achievements by some of them already, and as we get further through this list, you can see just how little the others have done too. Should be fun!)

- Yuta Tabuse scratched around in the D-League for a few years, trying to find a route back to the NBA. He barely got off of the bench, though, and this season returned to his native Japan, where he speculated that a season of beastly numbers would get the job done. (His hefty paycheck this year won't hurt, either.) However, he hasn't exactly been as brilliant as he might have hoped for - for Link Tochigi Brex, Tabuse averages 34.1 minutes, 11.0 points, 3.2 rebounds, 5.6 assists and 2.3 steals per game, shooting 23% from three point range. Still, the assists and steals totals lead the JBL, so he's still one of the better players amongst weak competition.

- Finally, Chris Taft's career progression has been minimal. Taft played only 17 games in his underwhelming rookie season of 2005/06 with the Warriors, before suffering prolonged chronic back injuries, and was waived that offseason with a year still guaranteed on his contract. He then didn't sign anywhere until early 2008, when he played 8 games for the Rio Grande Valley Vipers, averaging 4.0 points and 2.5 rebounds. True to form, Taft is currently unsigned, but he has recently been approached by Philippines National Team Director Rajko Toroman about whether he would be interested in ecoming a naturalized Filippino citizen, with any deal contingent on the health of his back. Clearly, it's still not quite right.

Of this list, only D.J. Strawberry played in the NBA last season. We're scraping the barrel for you here today.

Summer signings, round 29

- The Nets figured out that they could use a point guard, given that they only have two right now, one of whom is a shooting guard. So they brought in their former player Eddie Gill, as well as GM Kiki Vanderweghe's former mistake, Julius Hodge. They also signed another old boy, Awvee Storey, as well as some fella called Brian Hamilton. Those two can now battle valiantly for two weeks for the spot of 7th small forward on the roster, before both being waived anyway. Tough life.

- Jiri Hubalek's replacement at Phoenix's training camp is a man known by the slightly superb name of Coleman Collins, who played for the Raptors in summer league. Also turning out for the Suns' camp are Robert Hite, a highly capable three point shooter, and Trey Johnson, whose name suggests that he should be.

- The Clippers added Curtis Sumpter amongst their list of camp signings, and just as I was about to write about how they still made this move after barely playing him in their summer league campaign, I then realised that it wasn't Curtis Sumpter who played for the Clippers in summer league, but Curtis Stinson! Haha! God! I bet Sumpter gets that, like, ALL the time!

- In other Clippers news, Jason Williams retired not long after signing with the team. Bugger! I was really hoping for a J-Dub Redux, so much so that I have mentioned it like 80 times. And now we won't have one. Damn shame.

- Chicago made easily the best training camp signings out of everyone, because they're the best franchise in the sport. Genius comes naturally to them, and these signings reflect that. But enough of this overused hubris - they did actually make two good signings with Elton Brown and Darius Washington, fringe NBA players who can bring something that the team otherwise lacks, were they to make the roster. Roger Powell has far less chance of doing anything, but at least they get "hometown boy makes hometown team" stories out of it.

- Orlando made three signings of their own, with forward Jeremy Richardson, center Dwayne Jones, and point guard Mike Wilks. Three of my favourite fringe NBA players, they are. But I bet only Wilks sticks. Shame.

- Francisco Garcia somehow got a 5 year, $30 million extension from the Kings, which is basically MLE money. This after one decent year. Based on last year's play, and last year's play only, is Garcia worthy of the MLE? No, not really. He learnt how to shoot, but only to the direct detriment of his defense. Yet somehow, the Kings think that this one semi-decent season from a soon to be 27 year old backup is worth giving him a 5 year novelty oversized extension. Okay. Have fun paying him $7 million when he's 32. (Note: if Garcia tunes his game to the point where he plays the average defense that he used to play, yet keeps his fancy new jumpshot as well, then this will be fine.)

- Sammy Mejia, former draft pick of the Pistons, has signed for a Greek team named AEL 1964 Larissa, whose name derives from a joyous union of some opticians, the seminal Beatles smash "I Want To Hold Your Hand", and a 6'4 black transexual hooker. Sounds like a good night in.

- Philadelphia fully committed to this training camp idea, bringing in four players, seemingly stuck on the "R" page of their available players directory. Maureece Rice is a short fat guard who can't play point guard and who just came off a pretty damn poor senior year, Antywane Robinson is a training camp veteran small forward with an affection for his unspectacular jumpshot, Jared Reiner is a legend, and Justin Reed is trying to get back into the league after being one of the better players in the D-League last year. Those last two have a chance, depending on how deep the Sixers want to go. The Sixers also signed veteran Andre Emmett, but he has far less of a chance.

- Miami signed Eddie Basden as a energetic defensive guard with no offensive talent, and Matt Walsh as a perimeter shooter. But, considering that the Heat have already signed Koobs Diawara and James Earl Jones for those two roles, both of whoom have considerably more guaranteed money coming to them, you can probably go ahead and say with some confidence that there ain't no way in hell they're making the team. The Heat also signed Omar Barlett and Tre Kelley for camp, the kind of signings that training camp is about - a 28 year old forward so obscure that I had to translate the Polish calendar to figure out when his birthdate is, and a small guard who goes by an alias unbefitting of his style of play. Good times. I love training camp, me.



This will be the last of the summer signings posts, by the way. This is partly because news has pretty much dried up, and that most news now is just training camp signings, which will be fully documented in another post. But mainly, it's because it's not summer any more.

We'll go out with a bang. Two bangs, in fact. You're getting banged from all angles. Giggidy.

- Former Atlanta Hawks forward Hanno Mottola retired from the game last week, while in theory still at his "peak". That's bang number one.

- Bang number two; the mighty Shawn Kemp comeback, mentioned before here, is over after precisely 0 games. Kemp showed up in reasonable shape, but then stopped showing up at all. After flying home briefly to the USA - ostensibly to check that his property was fine after recent hurricanes - Kemp never came back, and the team ended the experiment, on seemingly courteous terms. To replace Kemp, the team have signed former NBA brick shithouse Brandon Hunter.

That is all. Summer officially just ended. So sayeth the Lord.