Where Are They Now, 2010; Part 20

Chris Ellis, featured in the last update, has moved from the Ukraine to Romania. Here's a couple of updates on people already covered;

1) Keon Clark has continued his weekly reviews in front of a drug court....or rather, he hasn't. At his January 27th hearing, Clark turned up but received a "bad report", and while I don't know what that entails, I do know that it meant serving two weeks in PSB (which I believe to mean "prison," as in "public safety building.") Clark then didn't turn up to his February 3rd hearing, and nor did he turn up to prison. I don't know how a man doesn't turn up to prison, but Keon didn't. He is now MIA and an arrest warrant has been issued. (He also managed to get done for both speeding and driving with a suspended license, AGAIN, since the last update was issued. STOP DRIVING, KEON.)

2) The reason Vin Baker is not playing is that he is now an assistant coach at Texas Southern University. So is Nick Van Exel. Texas Southern are playing live on British TV next week. We've come a long way.

(There are about 4 times more NCAA games than NBA games shown over here now, presumably because they're cheaper. It's good, though. And it would be better if the Lakers weren't in 80% of the NBA games shown. That figure is only slightly exaggerated.)


- Chinemelu Elonu

Lakers draft pick Elonu is in Spain, playing for Zaragoza. He is averaging 6.5 points, 6.1 rebounds and 1.4 blocks in only 19 minutes per game, shooting 60% from the field. That's the good news.

But why's he only playing 19 minutes per game? It's not because there's a more talented player in front of him, for Zaragoza are in the Spanish second division. Instead, it's because he's fouling 3.6 times per game, in a league where only 5 fouls are allowed in 40 minute games. Elonu has fouled out 6 times in 21 games, and has played more more than 27 minutes in any game (which, not coincidentally, is also the only game he had less than 3 fouls in). Elonu declared for the draft after his junior season, despite still not being ready; given that he turns 23 in 6 weeks and can't play half of Spanish second division games, he's got a ways to go yet.



- Melvin Ely

Ely joined the Kings for training camp, but did not make the team. Despite a shortage of size, the Kings felt that the rarely active Sean May, Kenny Thomas' expiring contract and the 5'11 Jon Brockman would suffice as backup big man options, and felt they didn't need Ely. Ely then went to China for some tryouts, at least one of which was with the Beijing Ducks. Ely may even have played a game with the team, and if he did, he totalled 14 points and 9 rebounds. It's almost impossible to tell, however, because Chinese information (in English) is almost impossible to come across, and running Chinese websites through Google Translate tends to translate the player names as well, which isn't helping anybody.

What we know for sure is this; Beijing started the year with Cedric Bozeman and James Mays as imports. Bozeman is still there and beasting, but Mays has left after posting roughly 30/11 for a couple of months. Mays was replaced by former Heat big man Ernest Brown, but an anonymous import played in a game a couple of weeks before Mays' departure. Was that man Ernest Brown, or was that man Melvin Ely, since Melvin was on trial there at the time? I do not know. And that's all the Melvin Ely news I have for you.

Here's one thing we do know for sure about the Beijing Ducks, though; 7'9 Sun Ming Ming is playing for them. He has 12 points, 18 rebounds, 2 blocks and 12 fouls in 83 minutes on the season. And he's still living rpoof that you can be too big for basketball.

Melvin Ely fact: Melvin Ely has more rings than Karl Malone.




- Andre Emmett

Emmett is also in China, but there's no ambivalence in his season so far. Playing for Shandong, he is leading the league with a 32.6 points per game average, alongside 8.2 rebounds, 3.4 assists and 2.7 steals. Emmett scored 151 points in his first three games, and never looked back, not even after a new year slump that saw him average a terrible 23ppg in five early January games.

In the last two years, Emmett has averaged 33ppg in China, 24ppg in France, 26ppg in Venezuela and 24ppg in Belgium. He's carefully avoided Italy and Spain, and didn't work out in his couple of NBA seasons, but he's putting up the numbers. And presumably, he's stacking paper.



- Carl English

English, who is Canadian, is spending his third season in Spain. In the summer he moved from Gran Canaria to Caja Laboral Vitoria, where he had the unenviable task of trying to replace Igor Rakocevic. After a bad start, English has perked up a bit, but he has struggled a bit against the elite competition. English averages 11.6 points and 3.6 rebounds per game in ACB competition, alongside 8.7 points and 2.4 rebounds per game in the Euroleague, playing 23mpg in each. He is also shooting a combined 44% from three point range between the two. However, English has 8 single figure performances in 12 Euroleague games, compared to just 6 in 21 ACB games. The ACB is good, but the Euroleague is better, and while Carl English's three point shot is working well for him in both competitions, he gets more one dimensional the further up the ladder you go.



- Zoran Erceg

Olympiakos retooled a large proportion of their roster this offseason, as they are wont to do, and this meant they no longer had room for Zoran Erceg. It tok a while, and included an abortive move to Maroussi (when the two teams agreed to terms before Erceg refused to go), but they eventually found a place to loan him to. Erceg is with Panionios and is averaging 17.8 points and 6.6 rebounds per game, leading the league in scoring and ranking 6th in rebounds.

When Olympiakos played Panathinaikos back in December, Zoran totalled 16 points in Panionios' 96-94 overtime victory, one of Olympiakos's only two Greek league defeats this season. (The other was to Maroussi, yesterday.) Given that the Greek league is a complete two horse race between Olympiakos and Panathinaikos - which is why their matchups mean so much - that loss was extremely painful. And so, needless to say, Zoran Erceg had the last laugh.



- Semih Erden

Celtics draft pick Erden is into his fifth season with Fenerbahce, and he's rebounding better this year. He's averaging 6.6 points and 5.1 rebounds in 19 minutes per game in the Euroleague, alongside 21/9.4/6.2 in the Turkish league. Since I have no trivia about Semih Erden, interesting or otherwise, let's move on to Ebi Ere.



- Ebi Ere

Ere is a Tulsa native and former Oklahoma graduate who has had a good professional career after a bad senior season. He's a good all around scorer who lacks that little something to be an NBA player, and by "that little something" I mean "above average size, above average athleticism, and/or above average jumpshot." One of the three would help, a combination even moreso, but it's not to be. This doesn't stop Ere from beasting all around the world, though, and after beasting in Australia this last two seasons (as well as in Puerto Rico last summer), Ere now finds himself in Italy. Playing for Pepsi JuveCaserta, who currently rank third in the league, Ere averages 15.9 points (6th in SerieA), 4.5 rebounds and 2.1 steals per game.



- Evan Eschmeyer

Eschmeyer retired almost five and a half years ago due to chronic knee problems, and last played almost seven years ago. He briefly went back to Northwestern to complete a law/business double degree, founded an online recruiting agency, and now works in the renewable energy business. Don't really understand his job, though.



- Daniel Ewing

Ewing - who played in 127 NBA games, only 26 less than Eschmeyer, despite having a career three years shorter - is signed with Prokom Gdynia in Poland. Gydnia are a Euroleague team, and Ewing is averaging 11.8 points and 2.8 assists per game in that competition, alongside 10.0/4.6 in the Polish league. His team mates include Qyntel Woods, Junior Harrington, Ratko Varda, Jan Jagla and David Logan, so we'll revisit Gydnia a few more times yet.




- Patrick Ewing Jr

Patrick Ewing Jr has not played in a game since last March due to injury. Last year he averaged 16.3 points, 8.9 rebounds, 1.3 blocks and 1.4 steals per game for the Reno Bighorns, but was waived with an MCL "sprain" that also kept him out of playing in the Knicks' summer league campaign. One year on, and that injury is keeping him out of action. I'm guessing it was a tear instead of a sprain.



- Christian Eyenga

Cavaliers draft pick Eyenga has moved from DKV Joventut's feeder team in the Spanish third division, all the way to the giddying heights of the first team. His first taste of ACB basketball has been fairly successful; in 11.4 minutes of 16 games, Eyenga is averaging 3.7 points, 2.1 rebounds, 0.8 blocks and 0.6 steals per game, shooting 54% from the field and 40$% from three point range. For a very raw 20 year old in a league where kids generally don't play much, that's pretty good.

Still waiting for his name to appear on the draft board, though.



Finally....

- Olu Famutimi

For a few years there, Nigerian-Canadian cut and shut job Famutimi was on the cusp of the NBA. He signed back to back training camp contracts, with the Sixers in 2005 and the Spurs in 2006, and was once touted as being the first player to go straight from a Canadian high school to the first round of the NBA draft. (This didn't happen, though. Obviously.) Now well into a European career, Famutimi is signed in Turkey and averaging 16.6 points, 4.7 rebounds and 1.9 steals per game for Oyak Renault Bursa. That's easily the best offensive season of his career, and shooting 41% from three point range is a large part of that (and a big improvement from a man who went 6-29 from there in 92 D-League games.)

Where Are They Now, 2009; Part 15

- Bryant Dunston is in South Korea, averaging 17.6 points, 10.0 rebounds and 2.9 blocks for a team called Mobis Phoebus. Dunston doesn't really have any chance of making the NBA, but after watching the entire Lakers summer league - in which an extremely backcourt heavy roster started Dunston at centre, with Sharrod Ford at power forward - I grew to like him. I seemed to like his unathletic yet reasonably smooth game featuring plenty of lefty baby hooks. It reminded me of Michael Sweetney. And I like Michael Sweetney. (In fairness to Dunston, at age 22 with reasonable skill, he still has a real faint chance of sniffing the NBA at some point, even if it's only a camp invite. But I don't think signing in Korea is getting it done. And he should probably put those three pointers to bed.)

- Ronald "Doop" Dupree didn't make the Cavaliers out of training camp, and went back to the D-League with the Tulsa 66ers. As is often the case when he's in the D-League, Doop has beasted, averaging 19.8 points, 6.6 rebounds and 3.7 assists, but he still can't shoot, shooting only 31% from three point range and 69% from the free throw line. He'll also be 28 on January 26th, so a happy birthday to him, although I'm sure we'll all have better things to be celebrating on that day. (In joke!)

- Ndudi Ebi is signed in Italy, and still hasn't panned out. Ndudi is the third leading scorer on an Italian team called Carife Ferrara, where he is the third leading scorer behind Harold Jamison (THE Harold Jamison! Throw-in to the Miles for McInnis swap Harold Jamison! None finer!) and Andre Collins (yes, THE Andre Collins! From Loyola! The very same!). Ebi is really the fourth leading scorer, if you also include Rick Apodaca (THE Rick Apodaca! Former Magic training camp invitee Rick Apodaca! Et cetera!), but Apodaca only played in 5 games before being kicked off the team after testing positive for pot. Ebi averages 11.5 points, 6.5 rebounds, 1.8 steals and 1.8 blocks per game, and rather impressively has only 2 assists in 15 games. Especially impressive given the sheer unrelenting calibre of scoring options that I just outlined.

- Former Hawks and Pacers centre Sexy John Edwards was recently acquired by the Sioux Falls Skyforce in the D-League, averaging 6.2 points and 5.2 rebounds, and is still pushing his campaign towards ending poverty in America. (See that? That was a John Edwards switcharoony. You can't write comedy gold like that. Well, unless you're me.)

- I've got nothing on Howard Eisley, but I'm also not interested in a Chris Crawford-style campaign, either. By the way, an update on that - it appears that Crawford tried a comeback in mid-2006, which ended without any contract being offered. He has moved back to Galesburg, Michigan, owns a company called Slam Dunk Stables, and somebody sent me a Google Earth overhead shot of his house. The internet - it's faaaaaantastic.

- Obinna Ekezie has not played since a stint in Russia ended in April 2007. After almost two years out of the game, and about to turn 34, I'm going to wildly assume that Ekezie is probably out of the game for good. Feel free to correct me, Obinna Ekezie's agent.

- Frank Elegar is signed with Bremerhaven in Germany, where he averages 9.2 points and 5.6 rebounds. Despite boasting both Jared Reiner and Mike Gansey, along with a brief stay by Marcus Slaughter, Bremerhaven are stone dead last in the German first division, with a 1-16 record. As for Fun Time Franky, like with Bryant Dunston above, Elegar's shot at this NBA thing is pretty slim, but, like Bryant Dunston above, Frank Elegar impressed me in summer league, as he showed a decent mid range game with the Wizards, even if his free throw release was kind of amusing. Note to very fringe NBA players out there - this is how you get famous. Sign in summer league and show me something, and I'll write nice things about you to a worldwide audience. And you can't get much more famous than by appearing on this website, let me tell you - Alexa.com says that this is the 79,062nd most popular website in Hungary. You can't buy publicity gold like that. Although this doesn't mean that you can't give me money if you want to.

- Lior Eliyahu is in his third season with Maccabi Tel Aviv, and crapping over his numbers of last year. Eliyahu leads his team in Euroleague play, averaging 14.7 points, 6.9 rebounds and 2.3 assists, and he doesn't do badly in Israeli league play either, where he averages a further 13.0 points, 5.6 points and 3.3 assists. Is that NBA calibre talent? Yep, probably. But an Israeli viewer of this website informs me that Eliyahu has a voice like a girl. So make of that what you will.

- Georgian superstar Tyrone Ellis averages 11.4 points in Spanish League play, and 9.8 points in EuroChallenge play. His backcourt team mates include former Pacer, Tyus Edney, who barely plays, and who is about to turn 36. Oh wait, sorry, I forgot to tell you who Ellis plays for, didn't I? It's Cajasol Sevilla. In Spain. Specifically, in Sevilla.

- Chris Ellis is on the same poor Tulsa 66ers as Doop is. Ellis averages 6.7 points and 5.2 rebounds in 20 games, shooting a sizzling 38% from the floor. I'm still not sure what he's good at.

- Andre Emmett went to Pau Orthez after being waived by the Sixers in training camp, and in the early going Emmett was a big boost to the struggling French side, averaging 23 points and 5.4 rebounds in 5 games, despite missing nearly a month due to injury. However, in December, Emmett left the team. No explanation as to why - he just left. My French is a bit ropey, but as far as I call tell, he went home for Christmas, and didn't bother coming back. That's European basketball for you, everybody. Wouldn't it be funny if that happened in the NBA?

- Carl English is stylin' in Spain, where he averages 15.6 points, 2.9 rebounds and 3.3 assists in Spanish league play for Kalise Gran Canaria. He also just won player of the weeks honours, in a week that saw him play so well that he won player of the week honours. What an honour. By the way, why do Americans call the spin you put on a pool/snooker ball "English"? Is it funny or clever? Because I'm not seeing either. The word is "side", "spin", or "sidespin". Don't mess with perfection.

- Finally, Zoran Erceg is playing for Olympiakos in Greece, where he averages 7.2 points in Greek league play, and 5.8 points in the Euroleague. You can't buy informative gold like that. Or rather, you can, but you don't have to, because I did it for you. ShamSports.com - the website that cares. About Zoran Erceg.

Summer signings, round 15

- Chris McCray signed with Rimini in Italy, a town whose very name made it destined for basketball greatness (and thus, by proxy, destined for Chris McCray). While we're on the subject of people named McCray, I'd like to extend an RIP to Colin McRae. And Steve Fossett. And Glenn Miller. And Matthew Harding. And Bernie Mac. And Mother Teresa. And basically anybody who has ever died. Except for maybe Fred West. And Hitler. And Judas. And Saddam Hussein. And Mutsuo Toi. I'll stop this now before you find a less preachy blog to read instead.

- Andre Emmett and JamesOn Curry are both reportedly negotiating with Hapoel Jerusalem. I know that this blog is about "signings" and not negotations, since a whole lot more negotiating goes on than signing. But, sod it. I'm a maverick. I don't play by the rules. Not even the arbitrary ones that I created in the first place. (Kevinn Pinkney was also supposed to be talking to Hapoel, despite a previous blog post relaying the news that he'd signed for an Italian team. However, now another report has come out saying that he's signed with a third team, also in Italy, called Cantu. The lesson, as ever: screw Danny Ainge.)

- Eugene Jeter signed with Vive Menorca of Spain (specifically, the island of Menorca), much to the chagrin of at least one Minnesota Timberwolves fan who thought that Jeter could be the answer to their team's "oh Jesus, someone has to pass the ball?" problem. Since the drafting of Derrick Rose, Eugene Jeter is no longer the best professional point guard in the world with the nickname "Pooh", so the question has to be asked as to why we should still care about him. (Poor old Pooh Richardson is now down to third place, despite his basketball career being far more successful than that of Pooh Jeter's to date. These rankings might not be official, or accurate. Also, if anyone wants to conduct a study as to why only point guards are nicknamed "Pooh", I'll help finance your work, to the tune of a couple of quid.)

- The L.A. Clippers signed Jason Williams, thus pretty much concluding their business for the offseason. At times in these posts, I have slated the Clippers for what I deem to be some cap mismanagement. (I stand by it, although it has been pointed out to me that the Eric Gordon signing was probably necessitated by the common practice that dictates that rookies won't play in summer camps without a contract. I sort of knew that already, but I'm willing to concede the point anyway, because I'm entirely brilliant and just a little bit self-congratulatory.) However, they deserve due credit: this summer, they have signed Baron Davis, Ricky Davis, Brian Skinner and Jason Williams as free agents, while also taking on the market value contract of Marcus Camby while giving up nothing. That right there is a succession of moves that sees decent-to-fine players obtained for good value - Baron Davis signed for far less than the maximum, Ricky Davis signed cheaply for one year, Skinner took the minimum, Williams may as well have done, and Camby is tied in for two years at an extremely good price for an elite centre. For this, the Clippers deserve their due. I still worry about their long term future, or lack thereof (although they do have something of a 2010 plan on the go), and they aren't going to win much other than a playoff spot in the immediate future. But that's not necessarily a bad thing, and signing good players for good prices never is. So, kudos.

- The Josh Smith played itself out thusly: Atlanta refused to budge from their lowball of a 5 year, $45 million offer; Smith looked elsewhere; Smith signed a 5 year and $58 million offer sheet from Memphis; Atlanta quickly matched. So that's pretty sensible all around. The news that Memphis isn't entirely against the idea of spending their cap room comes as a welcome relief, though, and it gives me an idea, one which will future in the next blog post. (Hint: It's based around an anagram of Neb Gondor. And the fact that I just made that a link may give the game away slightly.)

- Josip Sesar has signed with Zrinjski Mostar in Bosnia, and not the Boston Celtics. Damn shame.

- Sun Yue, second round pick of the Lakers last year, has agreed to sign with the team. Apparently, the important Lakers people reckon that Yue may get some point guard time, and Lamar Odom will also spent some time playing at the guard spots. Verdict: I think they're lying.

- Miami signed Yakhouba Diawara because they didn't think that they had enough players under contract yet.

- The Hawks signed Thomas Gardner and Othello Hunter. The Gardner signing, while largely inconsequential, gives the Hawks six guards not named Salim Stoudamire. That, plus this rather ominous blog report thing, gives me the vague idea that maybe Salim Stoudamire isn't going to back to the Atlanta Hawks next year. So, if there's anyone out there with sway in this 'ere NBA world - do me a favour. Either sign Salim Stoudamire, or help us find somebody who will. He's like Jannero Pargo, and everyone likes Jannero Pargo (or, rather, everyone hates playing against him.) He'll probably come cheaper, too. I demand that someone sign him. I have no leverage with which to make such demands, but that didn't do Luol Deng any harm. (Devin Brown also needs a home, but I think I'm over this now.)

- The New Orleans Hornets re-signed Ryan Bowen. Yeehaw. The Hornets' bench now reads thusly: Mike James, Rasual Butler, James Posey, Bowen, Hilton Armstrong, Julian Wright, and Melvin Ely. Who out of that lot do they expect to be a sixth man, exactly? They appear to have moved on from Pargo and Bonzi Wells, two players always willing to fashion a shot, even if they're not always a good idea. So who's going to provide the bench offense here? I'm aware that Chris Paul is basically Jesus, who could get even me an easy basket, but the real Jesus had a few days off, too. (He got his carpentry NVQ at a young age. Good plan. It's always a good idea to have a fallback option.) So the Hornets could really use someone that can find, take and make a shot off the bench. Mike James isn't getting it done, and Ryan Bowen really isn't getting it done.

Hey, I know! Maybe the Hornets could use Salim Stoudamire!

Where Are They Now? Part 11

Peja Drobnjak left the NBA due to "lucrative" European offers, apparently. I can't speak for how that has worked out for him, but I can tell you that he's now playing for Besiktas of Turkey, and that I don't know the extent of his lucrativeness, nor do I want to find it out.

Roberto Duenas has retired. TRIVIA QUESTION - Name the 6 players drafted by the Bulls to have competed in the Olympics. I'll give you some clues: Bobby Duenas is one, and Scottie Pippen isn't because the Bulls didn't technically draft him.

Ndudi Ebi is playing for Bnei Hasharon in Israel. Still English. Still brilliant. Yet still shit. (Bnei Hasharon have a starting lineup made up of a real Who's Who of NBA Never-Were's - Cookie Belcher, Jason Williams (not THE Jason Williams, nor the other Jason Williams, but a different Jason Williams), Ebi, Rod Grizzard and Ousmace Cisse. These are the things that keep me sane. I like to image that one or more of those players specifically went to Hasharon because of the opportunity to play with those luminaries. It's highly bloody unlikely, but it's a fun dream.

John Edwards is playing for Chirkassy in the Ukraine. Information like this is bloody hard to come across, given that there are many other, infinitely more famous people called John Edwards, who are currently making much more important news. So from now on, we'll call him Sexy John Edwards at all times, in a sort of Hacksaw Jim Duggan homage. It's for clarity's sake only, obviously.

Howard Eisley is out of basketball and seemingly untraceable.

Obinna Ekezie may have given up the dream to become like his hero Tony Massenburg, for he has not played professionally this season. Or maybe he's just injured. Couldn't say for sure.

Rockets draft pick Lior Eliyahu is playing in his native Israel for Maccabi Tel Aviv, and apparently struggling with a "new offensive hierarchy". Oooh, discontent? Does this mean he may leave and join Houston this summer? Maybe. Imagine how dull and inconsequential that would be. I'm moist already.

Tyrone Ellis is playing for Cajasol Sevilla, alongside Andy Betts and others. He also recently obtained Georgian citizenship. Somehow.

Chris Ellis is playing for The Cocks in the D-League.

Andre Emmett is in the powerhouse Belgian league, playing for Belgacom Liege, alongside no one that you've ever heard of, unless you've heard of Stephane Pelle.

Zoran Erceg- dammit, why do I make some of these profiles - is in his native Serbia playing for Zeleznik Beograd. Which also sounds like a munitions dump.

Evan Eschmeyer retired absolutely freakin' ages ago with dodgy knees, and seemingly no longer exists on this planet.